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Some people believe that it is best to work for one company for their entire life, while others think it is better to be able to change jobs frequently

Some people believe that it is best to work for one company for their entire life, while others think it is better to be able to change jobs frequently eb0Bx
There is a controversial question of whether people should work for an organisation for their entire life or they should switch their jobs regularly. While some people consider working in diverse organisations, I am more on the side to advocate working in one company for the long- term. On the one hand, many people choose to work for different companies or firms due to the ability to work in a different workplace or environment. Experiencing various types of environment at work can support people to discover themselves more, in order to also learn to cooperate with others, therefore, expand their social relations. Moreover, people who regularly alternate their jobs have more knowledge about numerous fields and jobs which are more appealing to recruitment programs. On the other hand, working for the same company also has many benefits. Employees who work for a long time in the same companies will receive many incentives such as promotions, training from the business and if they get a lot of bonuses that will help them improve their finances. Furthermore, they have a deeper knowledge about the system of the company as well as their profession. From these experiments will make them experts in their field, they have the opportunity to occupy senior positions in the business. For example, large enterprises prefer to choose employees with long term experience for positions such as director, managers. In conclusion, people might vary their opinion. Based on the aforementioned information, it is evident that the benefits of working for the same company outweighs that of changing jobs frequently.
There is a controversial question of whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should work for an
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
for their

entire
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
life or
they should switch their jobs
regularly
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in

diverse
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
, I am more on the side to advocate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
for the long-

term.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to work for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
or firms due to the ability

to work in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
workplace or environment. Experiencing various types of environment at

work can support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to discover themselves more, in order to
also
learn to cooperate with

others,
therefore
, expand their social relations.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
regularly
alternate their

jobs have more knowledge about numerous fields and jobs which are more appealing to

recruitment programs.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
also
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits. Employees who

work for a long time in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
will receive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
incentives such as promotions,

training from the business and if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a lot of bonuses that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their

finances.
Furthermore
, they have a deeper knowledge about the system of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
as well


as their profession. From these experiments will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them experts in their field, they have the

opportunity to occupy senior positions in the business.
For example
, large enterprises prefer to

choose employees with long term experience for positions such as director, managers.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might vary their opinion. Based on the aforementioned information, it is

evident that the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
for the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
outweighs that of changing jobs

frequently
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that it is best to work for one company for their entire life, while others think it is better to be able to change jobs frequently

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
259 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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