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some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. qMBp
As life is a roller coaster. Sometimes bad and good situations come in life, but it's not the end. Striving and improving is a constant struggle. So accepting whatever is coming your way is not always a better idea. On one hand, there are certain people who agree upon to just go with the flow. It gives you immense pleasure plus satisfaction. As you do not think much about it. Also, they are more successful in terms of happiness beause living a stress free life through out their lives. In addition to this, they are more relax due to which, they are not worried about their finances. But, they have a routine life without any excitement. For instance, if you look at lower level employees, they have small houses and no social gatherings. And they are not showing off any thing. According to survey, happiness lies more in stress free life. Other group is opposite to it, they believe that accepting worst conditions is not a right way of living. Thus, they must strive and make a change into their own lifes. Being optimistic and enthusiast is a best way to cope with it. Furthermore, taking continous stress may effect person's physical plus mental well-being. But it miraculously improves the quality of life. These type of people argue that detoriating health is not a problem unless they achieve their target. If we deeply looked at it, they are more on high wages. To sum up, I completly agree with the second statement. Firstly, accept the challenge and hardships. Secondly, work hard to improve your situation no matter what you loose in between. Therefore, I believe that living a life which you wishes for, cannot come easily. Also, you need to sacrifice things whether it's your mental peace or comfort zone.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is a roller coaster.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
situations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it's not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
. Striving and improving is a constant struggle.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
accepting whatever is coming your way is not always a better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

On one hand, there are certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
upon to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
go with
the flow. It gives you immense pleasure plus satisfaction.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
you do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
much about it.
Also
, they are more successful in terms of happiness
Possible spelling mistake found.
beause
living a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
Did you mean "throughout"?
through out
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
In addition
to this, they are more relax due to which, they are not worried about their finances.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, they have a routine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
without any excitement.
For instance
, if you look at lower level employees, they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and no social gatherings. And they are not showing off
Did you mean "anything"?
any thing
. According to survey, happiness lies more in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
free life.

Other group is opposite to it, they believe that accepting worst conditions is not a right way of living.
Thus
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
strive and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
into their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "lives", the plural form of the noun 'life'?
lifes
. Being optimistic and enthusiast is
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best way to cope with it.
Furthermore
, taking
Possible spelling mistake found.
continous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
may
Did you mean "affect"?
effect
person's physical plus mental well-being.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it
miraculously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. These type of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that
Possible spelling mistake found.
detoriating
health is not a problem unless they achieve their target. If we
deeply
looked at it, they are more on high wages.

To sum up, I
Possible spelling mistake found.
completly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the second statement.
Firstly
, accept the challenge and hardships.
Secondly
, work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your situation no matter what you loose in between.
Therefore
, I believe that living a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
which you
The pronoun 'you' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "wish"
wishes
for, cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
easily
.
Also
, you need to sacrifice things whether it's your mental peace or comfort zone.
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IELTS essay some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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