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Some people believe that international sporting events are the ideal opportunity to show the world the qualities of the hosting nation. Others believe that these events are mainly a large unjustifiable expense. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people believe that international sporting events are the ideal opportunity to show the world the qualities of the hosting nation. Others believe that these events are mainly a large unjustifiable expense. v. 1
For a few decades, Sports events hosting become very competitive amongst countries. They are showing their interest and using this opportunity to get a recognition across the globe. Although, it causes positive and negative impacts. In this essay, we will discuss both points with relevant examples. To begin with, organizing a games festival by countries will get a lot of benefits such as publicity, economic growth, political mitigations, etc. However, most developed countries occupy the place to conduct the events. The council should give a chances to developing countries also. Consequently, they will grow and expose their identity to a public. For instance, in 2000, Australia hosted the Olympic event, this fact that their economic growth was increased and also got a significant place in the developed countries list. On the other hand, when sports hosting, people lost their lands, waste their natural resources and also grounds went to not reusable after the event was completed, etc. Therefore, the country should aware the facts before starting otherwise they should answer if any question arises. Moreover, there are a huge amount and man works have to be spent for safety to ensure and handle the threats. For instance, in 1996, Atlanta Olympics, US Government spent more money for security. Then completion of the event, they leased their grounds to sports club to take their amount which was spent in creating grounds. To recapitulate, hosting a sport contest is not an easy thing. A country considers a lot of factors and should administer them correctly. Therefore, no issues arise and get reputation from other countries.
For a few decades,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
hosting become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
competitive amongst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. They are showing their interest and using this opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a recognition across the globe. Although, it causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts. In this essay, we will discuss both points with relevant examples.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, organizing a
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "games'" or "game's"?
games
festival by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits such as publicity, economic growth, political mitigations, etc.
However
, most developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
occupy the place to conduct the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
. The council should give
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a chance" or simply "chances"?
a chances
to developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
also
.
Consequently
, they will grow and expose their identity to a public.
For instance
, in 2000, Australia hosted the Olympic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
, this fact that their economic growth
was increased
and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a significant place in the developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
list.

On the other hand
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
hosting,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
lost their lands, waste their natural resources and
also
grounds went to not reusable after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
was completed
, etc.
Therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should aware the facts
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
starting
otherwise
they should answer if any question arises.
Moreover
, there are a huge amount and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
works
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be spent
for safety to ensure and handle the threats.
For instance
, in 1996, Atlanta Olympics, US
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
spent more money for security. Then completion of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
, they leased their grounds to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
club to take their amount which
was spent
in creating grounds.

To recapitulate, hosting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
contest is not an easy thing. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
considers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
factors and should administer them
correctly
.
Therefore
, no issues arise and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
reputation from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Some people believe that international sporting events are the ideal opportunity to show the world the qualities of the hosting nation. Others believe that these events are mainly a large unjustifiable expense. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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