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Some people believe that governments should ban dangerous sports. Others claim that they should have freedom to choose their favourite activities. Discuss both views and present your opinion

While some people claim that hazardous sports should be prohibited by the government, others believe for freedom choosing of preferred sporting activity. Although there are enough people agreeing with latter view, I concur with former opinion. ​Those who consent with first group of people, think that the life of man is more essential than all things. Therefore, they want government to ban risky sports. Almost everyday we read about sport accidents from news. Surely, this situation affect people. Specially, it is important nowadays. Assumin that, some sportmen do that for money, this is especially unfortunate. In this case, the role of government should be great with interdicting completely such kind of sports. I consider for health and decent life it is not necessary to do so. Because for happy life the health of our loved ones is enough. ​On the other hand, consenting with second thought people argue that government should give freedom people to choose favourite activity. Otherwise, it will be against human rights. If an individual undertakes responsibility, they can do any sports. Doing lovely sports makes people more happier and healthy. Whether they face difficulty on this way, it can make them depressed. Consequently, these people will be unhappy and feel themselves worthless. ​In conclusion, although a lot of people consider in the area of choosing sports everyone should be free, I am in the opinion to forbid dangerous sports for safety life.
While
some
people
claim that hazardous
sports
should
be prohibited
by the
government
, others believe for freedom choosing of preferred sporting activity. Although there are
enough
people
agreeing with latter view, I concur with former opinion.

​Those who consent with
first
group of
people
,
think
that the
life
of
man
is more essential than all things.
Therefore
, they want
government
to ban risky
sports
. Almost everyday we read about
sport
accidents from news.
Surely
, this situation affect
people
.
Specially
, it is
important
nowadays.
Assumin
that,
some
sportmen
do that for money, this is
especially
unfortunate.
In this case
, the role of
government
should be great with interdicting completely such kind of
sports
. I consider for health and decent
life
it is not necessary to do
so
.
Because
for happy
life
the health of our
loved
ones is
enough
.

On the other hand
, consenting with second
thought
people
argue that
government
should give freedom
people
to choose
favourite
activity.
Otherwise
, it will be against human rights. If an individual undertakes responsibility, they can do any
sports
. Doing lovely
sports
makes
people
more happier
and healthy. Whether they face difficulty on this way, it can
make
them depressed.
Consequently
, these
people
will be unhappy and feel themselves worthless.

In conclusion
, although
a lot of
people
consider in the area of choosing
sports
everyone should be free, I am in the opinion to forbid
dangerous
sports
for safety
life
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that governments should ban dangerous sports. Others claim that they should have freedom to choose their favourite activities. Discuss both views and present your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
236 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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