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Some people believe that global warming is the most challenging environmental issue that we have nowadays; however, others think deforestation has more destructive effects on earth.

Some people believe that global warming is the most challenging environmental issue that we have nowadays; however, others think deforestation has more destructive effects on earth. This essay will discuss why global warming and deforestation are both harmful for the environment. On the one hand, global warming has caused a drastic rise in temperature all over the world. It is mainly because of the high / higher amounts of radiation reaching the earth due to the depletion of the ozone layer which is caused by the emission of greenhouse gases such as carbon -dioxide and chlorofluro carbon. Because of such climatic changes, sea levels are bound to rise. For example, an article published by The Times in 2018 reported icebergs in Antarctica were melting at a higher rate than usual. If, this scenario continues increasing sea levels can cause an entire region to disappear or to be submerged. Moreover, the radiation effects can cause dreadful diseases affecting the skin and eyes. On the other hand, the cutting down of trees on a large scale will affect the quality of air. Trees absorb carbon dioxide which emanates from the burning of fossil fuels and releases oxygen. Thus deforestation can result in high carbon dioxide levels and low oxygen levels which cause damaging effects on the environment. The high CO2 levels can actually contribute to global warming as well. Generally speaking, the effects of deforestation are usually limited to the area that has lost the forest cover. But global warming is a phenomenon which affects the living beings all over the world. If this issue is unresolved catastrophic events such as tsunamis and hurricanes can arise frequently and also make human beings vulnerable to deadly diseases. In conclusion, deforestation and global warming are both harmful for the environment. While the effects of deforestation are limited to a particular geographical area, global warming has an impact on the whole planet. However, it is hard to say which is the worst because one thing leads to the other.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
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global
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warming
is the most challenging environmental issue that we have nowadays;
however
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
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deforestation
has more destructive effects on earth. This essay will discuss why
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global
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warming
and
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deforestation
are both harmful for the environment.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
has caused a drastic rise in temperature all over the world. It is
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the high / higher amounts of radiation reaching the earth due to the depletion of the ozone layer which
is caused
by the emission of greenhouse gases such as
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carbon
-dioxide and
Possible spelling mistake found.
chlorofluro
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carbon
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of such climatic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
, sea
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levels
are bound
to rise.
For example
, an article published by The Times in 2018 reported icebergs in Antarctica were melting at a higher rate than usual. If, this scenario continues increasing sea
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
can cause an entire region to disappear or to
be submerged
.
Moreover
, the radiation effects can cause dreadful diseases affecting the skin and eyes.

On the other hand
, the cutting down of trees on a large scale will affect the quality of air. Trees absorb
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide which emanates from the burning of fossil fuels and releases oxygen.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
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deforestation
can result in high
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carbon
dioxide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
and low oxygen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
which cause damaging effects on the environment. The high CO2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
can actually contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
as well
.
Generally
speaking, the effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
are
usually
limited to the area that has lost the forest cover.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
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global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
is a phenomenon which affects the living beings all over the world. If this issue
is unresolved
catastrophic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
such as tsunamis and hurricanes can arise
frequently
and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
human beings vulnerable to deadly diseases.

In conclusion
,
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deforestation
and
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global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
are both harmful for the environment. While the effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
are limited
to a particular geographical area,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
has an impact
on the whole
planet.
However
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to say which is the worst
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
one thing leads to the other.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that global warming is the most challenging environmental issue that we have nowadays; however, others think deforestation has more destructive effects on earth.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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