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Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and uses up the world’s fuel resources.To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and uses up the world’s fuel resources. XJAY
Global warming is considered as the major problem for whole planet because of the increasing pollution. It is argued by some individual that the most significant contributing factor for increase in pollution is air travelling, which consume lot of fuel sources. I reckon that air travel is causes of pollution to some extent, but In my opinion there are other major causative factor for rising pollution. To embark on, advancement in travelling industry leads to many serious problem such as pollution. A lot of aeroplane and other air travel take off and land every day in many countries due to the fact that many travelers are keen to travel various part of the world. The amount of fuel consumed by these transportation is in huge amount that in near future there might be the scarcity of fossil fuel. For instance, it is estimated that one jumbo air bus use a large amount of fuel that can fill the thousands of road transport like bus, car and truck. Also large amount of fumes is generated by huge aeroplane that can greatly impact environment. However I believe that that are other sources that causes pollution to our surrounding. For and for most is the vehicle, there are many vehicle like car, bus, truck and other transport that run on the road every day, and these means of transport used more fuel and emit excessive amount of carbon-dioxide and nitrogen-oxide that are harmful for our environment. . In addition, factories and industries generate large amount of greenhouses gases that are harmful to our environment, and these gases causes global warming-rise in the average temperature of the earth, as a result, many people might be the victims of tsunami, flood. For instance, because of the global warming each year japan, Bangladesh, India suffer huge loss of life and property due to flood. In conclusion, we cannot deny the fact that industrialization and urbanization are the primary causes of air pollution as well as deforestation, which results in decline of wildlife species.
Global warming
is considered
as the major problem for whole planet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
. It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individual that the most significant contributing factor for increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
travelling, which consume
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
sources. I reckon that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
travel is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
In my opinion there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
major causative
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "factors"?
factor
for rising pollution.

To embark on, advancement in travelling industry leads to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
serious problem such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
.
Possible agreement error. The noun aeroplane seems to be countable; consider using: "a lot of aeroplanes".
A lot of aeroplane
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
travel take off and land every day in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries due to the fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
travelers are keen to travel various part of the world. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
consumed by
Did you mean "this transportation" or "these transportations"?
these transportation
is in huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
that in near future there might be the scarcity of fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
.
For instance
, it
is estimated
that one jumbo
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
that can
The usual prepositions to use after "fill" is 'with' not "the" Did you mean "fill the thousands with"?
fill the thousands of
road transport like bus, car and truck.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of fumes
is generated
by huge
Possible spelling mistake. 'aeroplane' is British English.
aeroplane
that can
greatly
impact environment.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
I believe
Possible typo: you repeated a word
that that
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
sources that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
to our surrounding. For and for most is the vehicle, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "vehicles"?
vehicle
like car, bus, truck and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
transport that run on the road every day, and these means of transport
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
and emit excessive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of carbon-dioxide and nitrogen-oxide that are harmful for our environment.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
In addition
, factories and industries generate large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of greenhouses gases that are harmful to our environment, and these gases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
global warming-rise in the average temperature of the earth,
as a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
might be the victims of tsunami, flood.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the global warming each year japan, Bangladesh, India suffer huge loss of life and property due to flood.

In conclusion
, we cannot deny the fact that industrialization and urbanization are the primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
causes
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
as well
as deforestation, which results in decline of wildlife species.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and uses up the world’s fuel resources.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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