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Some people believe that a person’s criminal record should be removed when they reach the age of 18. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that a person’s criminal record should be removed when they reach the age of 18. v. 2
Young offenders who commit crimes will maintain a criminal record however some argue that after turning 18 this should be revoked. I disagree with this statement and this essay will providing reasoning why. Firstly, a criminal record is a form of punishment where it restricts future opportunities because of past actions. By having a criminal record certain countries will not allow you in and jobs will not hire you. This is a serious threat to people’s future which is a good reason for crimes not to be committed. For instance, if potential criminal knew that their record was to be cleared then the concern of ruining their future is removed and this will increase the number of underage crimes being committed. Secondly, a criminal record below the age of 18 isn’t likely to interfere with a convicts life too much therefore they won’t understand the severity of their actions. It is after the age of 18 where people look to go on holiday abroad or get serious jobs. As the convict hasn’t fully understood the repercussions of committing a felony, they are more likely to commit a crime again. An alternative would be to have mandatory rehabilitation at 18 as assurance to the general public the criminal is not a threat to society and can be accepted into the workforce. In conclusion, this essay argues that the criminal record should remain in place as deterrent for could-be criminal before committing a crime, and if there was a case where it was to be cleared then mandatory rehab must be complete.
Young offenders who commit
crimes
will maintain a
criminal
record
however
some
argue that after turning 18 this should
be revoked
. I disagree with this statement and this essay will
providing
reasoning why.

Firstly
, a
criminal
record
is a form of punishment where it restricts future opportunities
because
of past actions. By having a
criminal
record
certain countries will not
allow
you in and jobs will not hire you. This is a serious threat to
people
’s future which is a
good
reason for
crimes
not to
be committed
.
For instance
, if potential
criminal
knew that their
record
was to
be cleared
then the concern of ruining their future
is removed
and this will increase the number of underage
crimes
being committed
.

Secondly
, a
criminal
record
below the age of 18 isn’t likely to interfere with a convicts life too much
therefore
they won’t understand the severity of their actions. It is after the age of 18 where
people
look to go on holiday abroad or
get
serious jobs. As the convict hasn’t
fully
understood the repercussions of committing a felony, they are more likely to commit a
crime
again. An alternative would be to have mandatory rehabilitation at 18 as assurance to the
general public
the
criminal
is not a threat to society and can be
accepted
into the workforce.

In conclusion
, this essay argues that the
criminal
record
should remain in place as deterrent for could-be
criminal
before
committing a
crime
, and if there was a case where it was to
be cleared
then mandatory rehab
must
be complete.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that a person’s criminal record should be removed when they reach the age of 18.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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