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Some people believe it is better to travel to a foreign country for a holiday. Others believe it is better to stay at home when you have a holiday. Discuss both points of view and then give your own opinion.

Some people believe it is better to travel to a foreign country for a holiday. Others believe it is better to stay at home when you have a holiday. MjA9
During the holiday, several individuals prefer to travel abroad. While other individuals choose to sit at home when they are on vacation. In this essay, I will explore both opinions and then I will state my point of view. First, let’s examine why some people like to visit foreign nations. The first reason is that human beings are curious. In other words, they would like to explore other cultures than only concentrate on their countries. Moreover, many others love to know about the historical things in various nations. For example, Oman nation has many visitors due to the history stories and their ancient castles. The second reason is that they will be aware of other cultural values. To put it differently, there are a lot of nations globally which have their values and it's one of the most things which attracts individuals. For example, the popular foods in each nation, the unique celebration there, and the popular sports as well. Now, let’s explore why other people prefer to sit at home during the holiday. Firstly, they will be in their comfort zone. In other words, some people like to spend a lot of time with their family in a community which knew them. Moreover, they will not feel strange and stressed to deal with strangers. For example, if you are in a different country that does not speak your language you would deal with them with signs. Secondly, settled at home sheep than traveling. Differently, sitting with their laptop and other electronic devices didn't spend that much as well as travel to see a number of places you can parlay google it in 5 seconds. As a result of that, some of them choose to sit at home to put their budget better. Having analyzed both opinions, I’m of the opinion that traveling abroad during the vacation is better than sitting at home due to the curiosity of the people and to learn other cultural values
During the holiday, several individuals prefer to travel abroad. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
individuals choose to sit at home when they are on vacation. In this essay, I will explore both opinions and then I will state my point of view.

First
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
’s examine why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to visit foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. The
first
reason is that human beings are curious. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, they would like to explore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
cultures than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
concentrate on their countries.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to know about the historical things in various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
For example
, Oman
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
visitors due to the history stories and their ancient castles. The second reason is that they will be aware of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
cultural values. To put it
differently
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
globally which have their values and it's one of the most things which attracts individuals.
For example
, the popular foods in each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
, the unique celebration there, and the popular sports
as well
.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
’s explore why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to sit at home during the holiday.
Firstly
, they will be in their comfort zone. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time with their family in a community which knew them.
Moreover
, they will not feel strange and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
to deal with strangers.
For example
, if you are in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
country that does not speak your language you would deal with them with signs.
Secondly
, settled at home sheep than traveling.
Differently
, sitting with their laptop and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
electronic devices didn't spend that much
as well
as travel to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a number of places you can parlay google it in 5 seconds.
As a result
of that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them choose to sit at home to put their budget better.

Having analyzed both opinions, I’m of the opinion that traveling abroad during the vacation is better than sitting at home due to the curiosity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
cultural values
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IELTS essay Some people believe it is better to travel to a foreign country for a holiday. Others believe it is better to stay at home when you have a holiday.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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