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Some people believe it is better to raise children in the city, while others consider countryside to be a more suitable choice. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe it is better to raise children in the city, while others consider countryside to be a more suitable choice. YL05m
Children are the pillar of our societies and their upbringing has a significant effect on their own future as well as the country. Hence, the question raises as where is the best place for raising them. While some people think metropolitan areas are more suitable for them to be reared, others believe rural areas are better. In this essay, the benefits and drawbacks of both mentioned views are comprehensively investigated. The defenders of raising children in the countryside argue the availability of vast space in these parts helps children to exhaust their energy. Moreover, the countryside is less polluted, which in contrast to the cities, creates a healthier environment for a child to grow up. However, although the aforementioned advantages are important, seemingly making the countryside the best place in view of many people for raising their offspring, there are drawbacks as well. These parts are less populated; thus, there is a fewer number of educational and sporting facilities. Furthermore, the infrastructure of the countryside, namely roads, are less developed, making it harder for children to commute between school and home. On the other side of the argument lies the opposition’s viewpoint- the viewpoint that believes cities are better to raise children. They convincingly explain there are more opportunities for developing children’s skills due to the abundant availability of different educational courses in the city. For example, if a child shows talent in music, there are many classes that teach playing different musical instruments. Conversely, there are disadvantages that are related to city life. The first and perhaps the most downside is the pollution which jeopardizes public health, including children’s wellbeing with serious ailments. Another disadvantage is the higher chance of accidents caused by the increasing number of vehicles in crowded cities, which can also compromise the little one's safety. All in all, it can be concluded that there are many advantages and disadvantages to both city and countryside living. Cities are more developed and have more opportunity for children to enhance their skills, while living in the countryside in healthier in general. In the end, it is up to one’s preference to choose between them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
are the pillar of our societies and their upbringing has a significant effect on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
future
as well
as the country.
Hence
, the question raises as where is the best place for raising them. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
metropolitan areas are more suitable for them to
be reared
, others believe rural areas are better. In this essay, the benefits and drawbacks of both mentioned views are
comprehensively
investigated.

The defenders of raising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
argue the availability of vast space in these parts
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to exhaust their energy.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
is less polluted, which
in contrast
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, creates a healthier environment for a child to grow up.
However
, although the aforementioned advantages are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
,
seemingly
making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
the best place in view of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
for raising their offspring, there are drawbacks
as well
. These parts are less populated;
thus
, there is a fewer number of educational and sporting facilities.
Furthermore
, the infrastructure of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
,
namely
roads, are less developed, making it harder for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to commute between school and home.

On the other side of the argument lies the opposition’s viewpoint- the viewpoint that believes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are better to raise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. They
convincingly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
there are more opportunities for developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
due to the abundant availability of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
educational courses in the city.
For example
, if a child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
talent in music, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
classes that teach playing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
musical instruments.
Conversely
, there are disadvantages that
are related
to city life. The
first
and perhaps the most downside is the pollution which jeopardizes public health, including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
with serious ailments. Another disadvantage is the higher chance of accidents caused by the increasing number of vehicles in crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, which can
also
compromise the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
one's safety.

All in all, it can
be concluded
that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages and disadvantages to both city and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
living.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cities
are more developed and have more opportunity for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to enhance their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, while living in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
in healthier
in general
. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, it is up to one’s preference to choose between them.
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IELTS essay Some people believe it is better to raise children in the city, while others consider countryside to be a more suitable choice.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
356 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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