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Some people believe a country can benefits a lot from university education. Others believe sending a large number of young students to university leads to unemployment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe a country can benefits a lot from university education. Others believe sending a large number of young students to university leads to unemployment. 5A2jN
In the modern world university education is considered prestigious and many countries proud of their level of education and the number of top universities. University education contributes to the number of different specialists in the country such as scientists, doctors, engineers, politicians, and others. All of these professions play a significant role in the country’s economy and its success. However, at the same time, it can be difficult to find an adequate job after graduation, by virtue of a great amount of specialists and lack of vacancies for them on the labor market. On the one hand, people cannot get an occupation, which will be substantial for the state’s development, without a university education. Specialists in such spheres as medicine, science, economics, engineering, and education form a country’s position in the world and are crucial elements in its economy. For instance, university education in such countries as the United States and China is considered as one of the best and most prestigious in the modern world. At the same time, these countries are developed a lot in all spheres of life and have a good economy. Therefore, university education is directly connected with the state’s advance and is considerable for the country. On the other hand, a lot of people face the problem of finding a job after graduation from university. The most popular sphere in the labor market is the service sector, there are a lot of vacancies for sellers, waiters, managers, and others. And find a job as a scientist can be hard because such specialists are hiring rarely enough and only in a certain number of organizations. For example, there are about 4000-5000 universities in the United States, and such a big number of universities create a plethora of specialists in some narrow-focused spheres and, hence, the lack of available offers for them. Due to this many people became unemployed or start to work outside their specialty only to get some money. Whilst acknowledging both sides of this dilemma I remain convinced that university education plays an integral role in the country’s advance because the development of all other areas depends on it. And it is very important for the country to keep a high level of education in universities and encourage people to get it.
In the modern world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is considered
prestigious and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
proud of their level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of top
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
contributes to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
specialists
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
such as scientists, doctors, engineers, politicians,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
. All of these professions play a significant role in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
economy and its success.
However
, at the same time, it can be difficult to find an adequate job after graduation, by virtue of a great amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
specialists
and lack of vacancies for them on the labor market.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an occupation, which will be substantial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
state’s
development, without a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Specialists
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spheres
as medicine, science, economics, engineering, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
form a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
position in the world and are crucial elements in its economy.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
as the United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
and China
is considered
as one of the best and most prestigious in the modern world. At the same time, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are developed
a lot in all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spheres
of life and have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
economy.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
directly
connected with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
state’s
advance and is considerable for the country.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
face the problem of finding a job after graduation from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. The most popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sphere
in the labor market is the service sector, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
vacancies for sellers, waiters, managers,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
. And find a job as a scientist can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
specialists
are hiring rarely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of organizations.
For example
, there are about 4000-5000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
in the United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
, and such a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
create a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
specialists
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
narrow-focused
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spheres
and,
hence
, the lack of available offers for them. Due to this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
became unemployed or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to work outside their specialty
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money.

Whilst acknowledging both sides of this dilemma I remain convinced that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
plays an integral role in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
advance
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the development of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
areas depends on it. And it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a high level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it.
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IELTS essay Some people believe a country can benefits a lot from university education. Others believe sending a large number of young students to university leads to unemployment.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
379 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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