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some organization believe that their employees should dress smartly other value quality of work above apperance discuss both the view and give your opinion give reasons and relevant examples

some organization believe that their employees should dress smartly other value quality of work above apperance discuss both the view and give your opinion give reasons and relevant examples 1mGRN
It is commonly witnessed that most of the companies believe that workers should dress properly, while a handful of organizations think quality of work matters rather than good looking. I am of the opinion that job work is a prominent factor instead of appearance. Both the views will be discussed in the following paragraphs. On the one hand, corporate world focus on work quality over the dress sense because working skills matter. To be more clear with this, employers way of doing work benefits the industry. In addition to this, individual interpersonal skills assists them to become a good leader and better communication skills. Moreover, nowadays most of the jobs are online such as networking and marketing where there is no need to look smart and individual skills matter. On the other hand side, few industries believe that individual personality plays indispensable role in his career. furthermore, personality improves by good appearance and it attracts the customers and also provide a appropriate environment for completing tasks. Similarly, better dress sense boost the employees confidence and aid them to tackle the sensitive issues smartly. In my opinion, good job skills outweigh dress sense because wages are paid for the job not for the better clothes. To be more clear with this, sometimes over fashioned clothes distract the concentration of other employees. In abroad employers provide job hours according to their ability. For example, in the foreign nations there is no strict dress code in companies such uber eats and wolt. To conclude, although working skills assists the organization growth but a proper uniform or good appearance also enhances the company reputation.
It is
commonly
witnessed that most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
believe that workers should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
properly
, while a handful of organizations
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "thinks"? (Some collective nouns can be treated as both singular and plural, so 'think' is not always incorrect.)
think
quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
matters
rather
than
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
good looking
. I am of the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is a prominent factor
instead
of appearance. Both the views will
be discussed
in the following paragraphs.

On the one hand, corporate world focus on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
quality over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
sense
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
matter. To be more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
with this, employers way of doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
benefits the industry.
In addition
to this, individual interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
assists them to become a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
leader and better communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
Moreover
, nowadays most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are online such as networking and marketing where there is no need to look smart and individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
matter.

On the other hand
side, few industries believe that individual personality plays indispensable role in his career.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
furthermore
, personality
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
appearance and it attracts the customers and
also
provide
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
appropriate environment for completing tasks.
Similarly
, better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
sense boost the employees confidence and aid them to tackle the sensitive issues
smartly
.

In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
outweigh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
sense
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
wages
are paid
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
not for the better clothes. To be more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
with this,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
over fashioned clothes distract the concentration of other employees. In abroad employers provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
hours according to their ability.
For example
, in the foreign nations there is no strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dress
code in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
such
Possible spelling mistake found.
uber
eats and
Possible spelling mistake found.
wolt
.

To conclude
, although working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
assists the organization growth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a proper uniform or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
appearance
also
enhances the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
reputation.
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IELTS essay some organization believe that their employees should dress smartly other value quality of work above apperance discuss both the view and give your opinion give reasons and relevant examples

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
270 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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