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Some museums and art galleries charge admission fees, while others have free entry. Do you think the advantages of charging for admission outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Museums and art galleries are starting to attract more attention of the public these days. Admission fees are subjective to every museum, some prefer to charge fees while others have free entry. Charging admission fees might narrow down the number of visitors they receive. However, charging a small fee that would not trouble the visiters could be advantageous to these museums and art galleries. These institutions could use the fee to maintain and upgrade their art and other objects. The money could also be used in the administrative work of the place; employee salaries, repairs, bills and more. Development of more museums and art galleries would also be a benifit of charging admission fees as the financial aid recieved would encourage people. Another aspect of this is, the government would get taxes on this fee which would further result in development of such institutes. It would also paint us a clear picture of how interested the general public is towards art. Even after considering all the advantages, there still remain numerous reasons why charging an admission fee would have drawbacks. The foremost being, it would instanly alter the number of visitors they get as mentioned previously. The people responsible of the place might start getting greedy and increasing the fee. In some cases, it could make some people feel unwelcomed. But looking at both aspects, I strongly think that advantages far outweigh the disadvantages. Again there are some exceptions to this. But overall charging an admission fee could in the long run help in developing this sector and get more people interested in art galleries and museums.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries are starting to attract more attention of the public these days.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Admission
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
are subjective to every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
prefer to charge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
while others have free entry.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Charging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
might narrow down the number of visitors they receive.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
that would not trouble the
Possible spelling mistake found.
visiters
could be advantageous to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries.

These institutions could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
to maintain and upgrade their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
and other objects. The money could
also
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the administrative work of the place; employee salaries, repairs, bills and more. Development of more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries would
also
be a
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifit
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fees
as the financial aid
Possible spelling mistake found.
recieved
would encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Another aspect of this is, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
taxes on this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
which would
further
result in development of such institutes. It would
also
paint us a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
picture of how interested the
Consider using only “public” to avoid wordiness.
general public
is towards art.

Even after considering all the advantages, there
still
remain numerous reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
would have drawbacks. The foremost being, it would
Possible spelling mistake found.
instanly
alter the number of visitors they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
as mentioned previously. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
The usual collocation for “responsible” is “responsible for”. Did you mean “responsible for” or “in charge of”?
responsible of
the place might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
getting greedy and increasing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases, it could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel unwelcomed.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
looking at both aspects, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that advantages far outweigh the disadvantages. Again there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
exceptions to this.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fee
could in the long run
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in developing this sector and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
interested in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
.

IELTS essay Some museums and art galleries charge admission fees, while others have free entry. Do you think the advantages of charging for admission outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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