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Some countries attempt to solve the problem of traffic congestion by limiting the use of car. What are advantage and disadvangtages?

Some countries attempt to solve the problem of traffic congestion by limiting the use of car. What are advantage and disadvangtages? kbB7d
People are facing the dilemma of whether or not they should reduce their use of automobiles in urban areas to deal with traffic jams. Recently, this issue has been brought to public attention with people on opposing sides. In my opinion, this idea offers both benefits and drawbacks. On the one hand, we can reduce air pollution from release transport which burns many smoke and fossil fuels. If less cacbon dioxit release to the environment, people don't have to breathe polluted air. This has led to many serious health issues such as: skin diseases but people tend to ignore the downside of that. For example, people should choose to drive when the destination is only a block away. Second, people will have more space for other vehicles then they can move around the city easier. They will feel free to use their vehicles. It can release stress during rush hours. On the other hand, it has many problems. First, it is not easy for people when they sell their vehicles at a cheaper price than how much they initially bought for. Moreover, the companies will drop their production for that country. This has led to decreased job opportunities for workers who work in car companies or drivers. Second, using public transport has many problems. People waste too much time taking up, then they take several hours to get to a destination which would have been in just 10 minutes by car. The quality of system transport is often quite poor, such as being crowded or dirty, which makes people feel uncomfortable. Moreover, it is a higher chance of infections with disease because many people go on together. In short, too many cars will lead to more traffic jams, accidents and especially environmental problems in the city. But on the other hand, it still has some benefits. If there suggestions should be implemented as soon as possible then city resident will no longer suffer from traffic problems.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are facing the dilemma of
Consider shortening this phrase to just "whether". It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
whether or not
they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of automobiles in urban areas to deal with traffic jams. Recently, this issue has
been brought
to public attention with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
on opposing sides. In my opinion, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
offers both benefits and drawbacks. On the one hand, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
air pollution from release transport which burns
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
smoke and fossil fuels. If less
Possible spelling mistake found.
cacbon
Possible spelling mistake found.
dioxit
release to the environment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
don't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
breathe polluted air. This has led to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
serious health issues such as: skin diseases
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the downside of that.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should choose to drive when the destination is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a block away. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will have more space for other vehicles then they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
around the city easier. They will feel free to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their vehicles. It can release
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
during rush hours.
On the other hand
, it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
First
, it is not easy for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
when they sell their vehicles at a cheaper price than how much they
initially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
for.
Moreover
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
will drop their production for that country. This has led to decreased job opportunities for workers who work in car
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
or drivers. Second, using public transport has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
waste too much time taking up, then they take several hours to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to a destination which would have been in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
10 minutes by car. The quality of system transport is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
quite poor, such as
being crowded
or dirty, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel uncomfortable.
Moreover
, it is a higher chance of infections with disease
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
go on together. In short, too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cars will lead to more traffic jams, accidents and
especially
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in the city.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
on the other hand
, it
still
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits. If
Please check whether a verb is missing here or whether 'there' should be 'their'.
there suggestions
should
be implemented
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible
Comparison is written 'as possible "as"'.
then
city resident will no longer suffer from traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
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IELTS essay Some countries attempt to solve the problem of traffic congestion by limiting the use of car. What are advantage and disadvangtages?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
326 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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