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Some believe that charitable organisations should help people no matter where they live. Others argue that charities should only help those living in the country where the charity is based. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is believed by few people that charitable organisations should help people without considering the location they live while others believe that welfare should help to the country residence only. In my opinion, charity group should prefer to their country residence as it will improve the financial and educational circumstances of country. On one hand, some people consider that welfare organisation should give charity all around the globe. They believe that humanity should have no geographical boundaries. In case of any catastrophe giving charity internationally is like helping hand and providing support towards the victim country. In 2004, when tsunami hit; Indonesia received charity from all around the world. People sent blankets, grocery, and other household items to the effected people of Tsunami through welfare organisation. Furthermore, it highlights the country at international level where the organisation is based. And it will have a good impact on country’s reputation. On other hand, some people argue that needy people in their own country deserve welfare help. It helps to fight against poverty and improves the financial condition of the country. In Pakistan, there are many labourer who work on a daily wage. Their income is not enough to run a family. Hence, these charity organisations should help them to live a better life. Moreover, literacy rate can be increased through NGOs that work on educational development. Recently, there are few charity organisations in Karachi that providing a platform to poor people who can not afford educational expenses. In my opinion, charity groups should prefer to give support to the people who live in the same country where the charity group is based as it will enhance the financial condition of the country and it will take part to progress the life of poor people by giving support in various disciplines.
It
is believed
by few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that charitable
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
without considering the location they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
while others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
welfare
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
residence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
group should prefer to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
residence as it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the financial and educational circumstances of country.

On one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
welfare
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
should give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
all around the globe. They believe that humanity should have no geographical boundaries. In case of any catastrophe giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
internationally
is like helping hand and providing support towards the victim
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In 2004, when tsunami hit; Indonesia received
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
from all around the world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
blankets, grocery, and other household items to the effected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of Tsunami through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
welfare
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
.
Furthermore
, it highlights the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
at international level where the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
is based
. And it will have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
reputation.

On other hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that needy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
deserve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
welfare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to fight against poverty and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the financial condition of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In Pakistan, there are
Possible agreement error. The noun labourer seems to be countable; consider using: "many labourers".
many labourer
who work on a daily wage. Their income is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to run a family.
Hence
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a better life.
Moreover
, literacy rate can
be increased
through NGOs that work on educational development. Recently, there are few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
in Karachi that providing a platform to poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who can not afford educational expenses.

In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
groups should prefer to give support to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charity
group
is based
as it will enhance the financial condition of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
to progress the life of poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by giving support in various disciplines.
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IELTS essay Some believe that charitable organisations should help people no matter where they live. Others argue that charities should only help those living in the country where the charity is based.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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