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News about problems and emergencies is harmful to individuals and society. Do you agree or disagree?

With the emergence of media, people immediately get to know about the events that take place in different parts of the world and most of the time it leaves them in a despondent situation. In my opinion, although it is true that in some situations news about emergent and difficult situations disturbs the peace of mind, I personally feel that most of the time it is beneficial for the society and individuals. On the one hand, news about crises and predicament promotes the sense of fear among masses. To explain it further, when people see the turbulent and catastrophic events happening in any part of the world, not only does it land people in a sad mood, but it also generates stress and depression in them. For example, when people watched the news about 9/11 accident in the USA, most of the people got depressed for many days because they could not stay calm after watching such immensely violent news. Thus, it is undeniable that such type of information is detrimental to people and society. On the other hand, despite of the negative effects of such news, I do not think this is the case always. When media telecast news about the most pressing issues such as global warming, pollution, and natural resources, it not only creates awareness among people about the environmental issues, but also promotes the sense the responsibility to preserve it. For instance, last year an article published in the Asian Times revealed that the amount of plastic content in oceans is likely to rise by 50% by 2025 if people do not abandon the habit of its usage. After that news, the government of Indian imposed taxes on plastic use and people started using clothes bags. Therefore, I believe that these types of news plays imperative role in making the lives and environment better. In conclusion, while some critical news could create chaos in one’s life, I doubt that it is harmful to individuals always because news gives knowledge about the real-time situations happening in the world in order to make changes in lives.
With the emergence of media,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
immediately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
that take place in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the world and most of the time it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
them in a despondent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
. In my opinion, although it is true that in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "situations'" or "situation's"?
situations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
about emergent and difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
disturbs the peace of mind, I
personally
feel that most of the time it is beneficial for the society and individuals.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
about crises and predicament promotes the sense of fear among masses. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it
further
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the turbulent and catastrophic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
happening in any part of the world, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
does it land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a sad mood,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
generates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and depression in them.
For example
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
about 9/11 accident in the USA, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
depressed for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they could not stay calm after watching such
immensely
violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
Thus
, it is undeniable that such type of information is detrimental to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and society.

On the other hand
,
Did you mean "despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
despite of
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this is the case
The adverb 'always' is usually not used at the end of a sentence.
always
. When media telecast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
about the most pressing issues such as global warming, pollution, and natural resources, it not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
creates awareness among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about the environmental issues,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
promotes the sense the responsibility to preserve it.
For instance
, last year an article published in the Asian Times revealed that the amount of plastic content in oceans is likely to rise by 50% by 2025 if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not abandon the habit of its usage. After that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of Indian imposed taxes on plastic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
using clothes bags.
Therefore
, I believe that these types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
plays imperative role in making the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and environment better.

In conclusion
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
critical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
could create chaos in one’s life, I doubt that it is harmful to individuals always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
gives knowledge about the real-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
happening in the world in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
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IELTS essay News about problems and emergencies is harmful to individuals and society.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
348 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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