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Solar power usage to transfer water from low level of soil to the countryside

A presented picture reveals the way water pump works with aid of solar power. Generally speaking, it is clearly seen how solar power cells absorb light from the sun to generate water from underground level to fulfill villagers' needs. First of all, to transfer water from low level of soil to the countryside, it requires some supporting equipment. They are solar panel photovoltaic cells, DC power from panel, water tank, and bore pump. Material used in this process is mainly solar power from sunlight. In the beginning, solar panel is built next to the immersed-bore pump, which goes down underground after drilling to be well. Afterwards, substantial amount of light is captured by the solar cells that are transformed to be electricity through DC power. Secondly, such converted current will encourage water from the lowest level of well turning up. Water will be gone up to water tank by helping of electricity, which will be flown in to the village. Next, it will be utilized by societies in various necessities.
A presented picture reveals the way
water
pump works with aid of
solar
power
.
Generally
speaking, it is
clearly
seen
how
solar
power
cells absorb light from the sun to generate
water
from underground level to fulfill villagers' needs.

First of all
, to transfer
water
from low level of soil to the countryside, it requires
some
supporting equipment. They are
solar
panel photovoltaic cells, DC
power
from panel,
water
tank, and bore pump. Material
used
in this process is
mainly
solar
power
from sunlight. In the beginning,
solar
panel
is built
next
to the immersed-bore pump, which goes down underground after drilling to be well. Afterwards, substantial amount of light
is captured
by the
solar
cells that
are transformed
to be electricity through DC power.

Secondly
, such converted
current
will encourage
water
from the lowest level of well turning up.
Water
will
be gone
up to
water
tank by helping of electricity, which will
be flown
in to the village.
Next
, it will
be utilized
by societies in various necessities.
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IELTS essay Solar power usage to transfer water from low level of soil to the countryside

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
170 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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