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Social Media websites have amassed large user bases, and have become the sole source of information for their users. Do the advantages of being a part of a social media site outweigh the disadvantages?

Social Media websites have amassed large user bases, and have become the sole source of information for their users. Do the advantages of being a part of a social media site outweigh the disadvantages? wpaY
Social media websites are becoming popular day by day and there is huge group of people using it as a platform to connect with others. In my opinion there are very few negatives than positives as it helps people to stay connected with their dear ones and the society. In this essay, I will discuss firstly about the advantages of social media followed by how the disadvantages are negligible compared to the pros. To commence with, the greatest benefit of social media is to connect with individuals across the world and to follow and support their activities. It helps to make and maintain friendships with people in different part of earth. In addition to this, there are online platforms which helps individuals to find new jobs and share their knowledge. These websites makes recruitment process easier as well as it helps to find online mentors. For example, recruiters can find the right talent through online job searching portals like LinkedIn. On the other hand, there is an increase in the cyber crime through social media websites. There are many fake sites asking for confidential information or offering some benefits on payment of money, but they never provide any services after payment. However, by taking some precautions such issues can be avoided. Moreover, recently people started using social media platform for exhibiting their creative skills. People are getting recognized for their art works and the audience can relax and enjoy watching these. For example, Youtube vloging has become very popular now a days. To conclude, I would say social media platforms are very essential for growing socially, professionally and emotionally. So, in my opinion, social media platforms have more pros than cons and the disadvantages can be ignored.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
websites are becoming popular day by day and there is huge group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using it as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platform
to connect with others. In my opinion there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few negatives than positives as it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to stay connected with their dear ones and the society. In this essay, I will discuss
firstly
about the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
followed by how the disadvantages are negligible compared to the pros.

To commence with, the greatest benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is to connect with individuals across the world and to follow and support their activities. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
and maintain friendships with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
part of earth.
In addition
to this, there are online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
individuals to find new jobs and share their knowledge. These websites
You should probably use "make".
makes
recruitment process easier
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
well as it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to find online mentors.
For example
, recruiters can find the right talent through online job searching portals like LinkedIn.

On the other hand
, there is an increase in the cyber crime through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
websites. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fake sites asking for confidential information or offering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits on payment of money,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they never provide any services after payment.
However
, by taking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
precautions such issues can
be avoided
.
Moreover
, recently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platform
for exhibiting their creative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are getting recognized for their art works and the audience can relax and enjoy watching these.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
Possible spelling mistake found.
vloging
has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular
Did you mean "nowadays"?
now a days
.

To conclude
, I would say
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential for growing
socially
,
professionally
and
emotionally
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
platforms
have more pros than cons and the disadvantages can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.

IELTS essay Social Media websites have amassed large user bases, and have become the sole source of information for their users. Do the advantages of being a part of a social media site outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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