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Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be illegal. Do you agree or disagree with this views?

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be illegal. with this views? 0Aep9
It is generally asserted that, smoking has detrimental effects on the health of people, it is the main root cause of various ailments and it ought to be banned so this essay will meticulously scrutinize why this habit is harmful. On the one hand, firstly, cigarette smoking considered to lower stress, second, with the hectic and busy lifestyle, these days, it is arduous for peoples minds to not be in constant turmoil and the reasonable prices of these products make it and easy solution for one to choose in order to be opted for. A good illustration of this is a college student has academic pressure and find their solace in smoking a cigarette. On the surface, the number of people surrounding them tempting them and suppress them to utilize it. Finally, the exorbitant price of products culminates to use cigarette and not abandon them. It is widely acknowledged that on the other hand, smoking can cause different kinds of illnesses such as respiratory disease and cardiovascular disease, having negative consequences. Some effects of smoking include bad breath, stained teeth and premature skin, in fact, it leads to a number of well-being problems, such as high risk of lung cancer and heart attacks and it may lead to addiction. Nonetheless, government should prohibit smoking and impose heavy fine. If the state imposes strict laws, the people should obey the laws and the rate of smoking decrease significantly. Therefore, impose tougher laws can assist the health of individuals in the nation and reduce numerous disease. In conclusion, this essay stated why smoking is harmful and in my opinion, it has a detrimental effect both on health and life. Indeed, impose stricter laws by the government will help achieve a better society.
It is
generally
asserted that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
has detrimental effects on the health of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, it is the main root cause of various ailments and it ought to
be banned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this essay will
meticulously
scrutinize why this habit is harmful.

On the one hand,
firstly
, cigarette
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
The verb 'considered' is used with the gerund form: "considered lowering", "considered lowing".
considered to lower
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, second, with the hectic and busy lifestyle, these days, it is arduous for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
minds to not be in constant turmoil and the reasonable prices of these products
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it and easy solution for one to choose in order to
be opted
for. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
illustration of this is a college student has academic pressure and find their solace in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
a cigarette. On the surface, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
surrounding them tempting them and suppress them to utilize it.
Finally
, the exorbitant price of products culminates to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
cigarette and not abandon them.

It is
widely
acknowledged that
on the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of illnesses such as respiratory disease and cardiovascular disease, having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
include
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
breath, stained teeth and premature skin, in fact, it leads to a number of well-being problems, such as high
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of lung cancer and heart attacks and it may lead to addiction. Nonetheless,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should prohibit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impose
heavy fine. If the state
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imposes
strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should obey the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
and the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
decrease
significantly
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impose
tougher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
can assist the health of individuals in the nation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
numerous disease.

In conclusion
, this essay stated why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
is harmful and in my opinion, it has a detrimental effect both on health and life.
Indeed
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impose
stricter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
achieve a better society.
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IELTS essay Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be illegal. with this views?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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