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Since population is rapidly increasing in the world, there is an acute shortage of houses in the big cities. Should we construct multistory buildings in the existing cities or should we develop suburbs and new cities in the countryside? Give your opinion

Since population is rapidly increasing in the world, there is an acute shortage of houses in the big cities. Should we construct multistory buildings in the existing cities or should we develop suburbs and new cities in the countryside? Give your opinion YLkrV
Because of rapid growth in the population, there has been an acute shortage of living accommodation in the big cities. Since the big cities offer more job opportunities, many people from various places are attracted to them. Therefore, every available area in the big city is used to accommodate the rising population as well as the migrants. The migrant laborers occupy every vacant place in the big cities and set up slums there. It creates insanitary conditions, traffic jams and also causes shortage of water and electricity. To solve this problem, some people suggest that multistory buildings should be built in the large cities. The high-rising buildings require less land their construction is less costly. They also provide compact and safe living. But multistory buildings have their own problems. Living there is full of noise, disturbance and interference. There is less privacy. These buildings are less airy and sunny, and also cause parking problems. They are also potential fire hazards. Moreover, more people means more vehicles and more pollution and traffic jams. On the other hand, if we develop suburbs or new cities, they give us the feeling of independent and open living. Individual houses are airy and sunny. People can grow lawns and plant trees, and other plants which are good of environment and health. They can enjoy privacy and peace of mind. But the disadvantages are they decrease the agricultural land and forests, and are much more costlier than the multistory buildings. In my opinion, developing new cities or suburbs is better than building the tall buildings. New cities can provide more facilities like wider roads, more green areas, and ample place for parking and other things. In new cities, the pollution levels are also less. There can also be 2-3 story cheap houses for the poor to avoid the development of slum areas. Such cities will solve the problem of the shortage of houses in the big cities and will also reduce the chaos in them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of rapid growth in the population, there has been an acute shortage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
accommodation in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. Since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
offer more job opportunities,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from various places
are attracted
to them.
Therefore
, every available area in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to accommodate the rising population
as well
as the migrants. The migrant laborers occupy every vacant place in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and set up slums there. It creates insanitary conditions, traffic jams and
also
causes shortage of water and electricity.

To solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suggest that multistory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
should
be built
in the large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. The high-rising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
land their construction is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
costly. They
also
provide compact and safe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
multistory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Living
there is full of noise, disturbance and interference. There is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
privacy. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
airy and sunny, and
also
cause parking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. They are
also
potential fire hazards.
Moreover
, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
means
more vehicles and more pollution and traffic jams.

On the other hand
, if we develop suburbs or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, they give us the feeling of independent and open
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
. Individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
are airy and sunny.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can grow lawns and plant trees, and other plants which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
of environment and health. They can enjoy privacy and peace of mind.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the disadvantages are they decrease the agricultural land and forests, and are much
Use only "costlier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more costlier
than the multistory buildings.

In my opinion, developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
or suburbs is better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
the tall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
can provide more facilities like wider roads, more green areas, and ample place for parking and other things. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, the pollution levels are
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
. There can
also
be 2-3 story
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
for the poor to avoid the development of slum areas. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
will solve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of the shortage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the chaos in them.
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IELTS essay Since population is rapidly increasing in the world, there is an acute shortage of houses in the big cities. Should we construct multistory buildings in the existing cities or should we develop suburbs and new cities in the countryside? Give your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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