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Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves? w1ee
Is it necessary for prosperous counrties to share their wealth with under previleged countries by helping them with nourishment and schooling? perhaps is under previelaged countries are solely resposible for their people? I believe that rich countries should help deprived countries as in the faith of humanity and adverse effects due to geographical limits of deprived countries. As we all are humans and I think helping one other will this planet a better place to live. Although the supreme authorities in the disadvantaged nations should be responsible for their nations upbringing. However, their are several other factors whcih will not allow this deprived nations to focus on whole country. Every country has a budget from their tax payers and schemes and this budget may not always keep everything on track. Therefore as in faith of humanity rich nations should help. Some countries might be resourceful while others may not. like China have reservoirs minerals and Kuwait has reservoirs of crude oil. While their are some other small countries which do not have this in demand resources which is not attracting the consumers and, Therefore, resulting in disadvanataged. Due the geographical restrictions and some countries which whole surrounded by oceans may bring disaster in one countries economy even with a small natural calamity. Hence, the geography of a nation plays a vital role in one countries development. Inspite of having good governace, some countries still faces many challenges. for example: Bhutan. The Bhutan is covered by mountains which makes this country difficult to bring air transport in country which makes this country unaware of many other resources. In conclusion, I believe that rich nations should help deprived countries with nourishment and education.
Is it necessary for prosperous
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counrties
to share their wealth with under
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previleged
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countries
by helping them with nourishment and schooling?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
perhaps
is under
Possible spelling mistake found.
previelaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
solely
Possible spelling mistake found.
resposible
for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
? I believe that rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deprived
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
as in the faith of humanity and adverse effects due to geographical limits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deprived
countries.

As we all are humans and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
helping one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
will this planet a better place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. Although the supreme authorities in the disadvantaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
should be responsible for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
upbringing.
However
,
Did you mean "there"?
their
are several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
factors
Possible spelling mistake found.
whcih
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deprived
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
to focus on whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has a budget from their tax payers and schemes and this budget may not always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
everything on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
as in faith of humanity rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
might be resourceful while others may not.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
like
China have reservoirs minerals and Kuwait has reservoirs of crude oil. While
Did you mean "there"?
their
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
which do not have this in demand resources which is not attracting the consumers and,
Therefore
, resulting in
Possible spelling mistake found.
disadvanataged
.
It appears that a preposition is missing after 'Due'.
Due the
geographical restrictions and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
which whole surrounded by oceans may bring disaster in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
economy even with a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
natural calamity.
Hence
, the geography of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
plays a vital role in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
development.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Inspite
of having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake found.
governace
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
still
faces
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
challenges.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
example: Bhutan. The Bhutan
is covered
by mountains which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
difficult to bring air transport in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
unaware of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
resources.

In conclusion
, I believe that rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deprived
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
with nourishment and education.
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IELTS essay Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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