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Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves? EbXM
There is no doubt that news plays a crucial role in keeping everyone updated with our life. While the amount of new media channels are consistently increasing thanks to the internet, only a few young audiences are following news on prints and TVs. In this essay, I will explore the cause of this issue and explain my suggestions to alleviate its negative effect. One reason for low news followers among the youth demographic is that newspapers and TV are mostly dominated by bad press. While trying to accumulate their revenue via advertising, news editors tend to prefer stories with shocking details and scandalous multimedia. This has resulted in a news environment with limited reliable and quality reports, which kept the readers away. One of the solutions is to promote news stories with a higher standard as well as utilize more reliable news sources as this will prove that people can indeed gain bonafide information from them. Furthermore, it is evident that numerous newspaper and TV channels overused their platforms as an advertising agency. While audiences have to endure a multitude of advertisements during the show, newspapers are spread with an abundant amount of ads. Not only will this distract the readers from the story, but people may also feel that they are exploited, and spending time with their segments seems like a waste of time, with no legit useful information. I would suggest that a regulation should be enforced to limit the number of advertisements on all platforms. This will directly re-introduce our story as the main focus of the page or the program, whereas advertising promotions can be used to enhance their interactions with the media companies. In conclusion, although young readers and viewers may not perceive newspaper and TVs as a reliable source of information due to the overuse of scandalous news and too many ads, I would argue that it is the platform’s responsibility to improve their work ethics with a higher standard of story quality and news sources. In addition, the government should protect viewers by regulating the appropriate amount of promotional foot-prints among media outlets.
There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
plays a crucial role in keeping everyone updated with our life. While the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
media channels are
consistently
increasing thanks to the internet,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few young audiences are following
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
on prints and TVs. In this essay, I will explore the cause of this issue and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my suggestions to alleviate its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect.

One reason for low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
followers among the youth demographic is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and TV are
mostly
dominated by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
press. While trying to accumulate their revenue via advertising,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
editors tend to prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
with shocking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
and scandalous multimedia. This has resulted in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
environment with limited reliable and quality reports, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
the readers away. One of the solutions is to promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
with a higher standard
as well
as utilize more reliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
sources as this will prove that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
indeed
gain
Possible spelling mistake found.
bonafide
information from them.

Furthermore
, it is evident that numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
and TV channels overused their platforms as an advertising agency. While audiences
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
endure a multitude of advertisements during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
are spread
with an abundant amount of ads. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
will this distract the readers from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may
also
feel that they
are exploited
, and spending time with their segments seems like a waste of time, with no legit useful information. I would suggest that a regulation should
be enforced
to limit the number of advertisements on all platforms. This will
directly
re-introduce our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
as the main focus of the page or the program, whereas advertising promotions can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to enhance their interactions with the media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

In conclusion
, although young readers and viewers may not perceive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
and TVs as a reliable source of information due to the overuse of scandalous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
and too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ads, I would argue that it is the platform’s responsibility to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their work ethics with a higher standard of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
story
quality and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
sources.
In addition
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should protect viewers by regulating the appropriate amount of promotional foot-prints among media outlets.
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IELTS essay Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
350 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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