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Should sports classes be sacrificed in High School so students can concentrate on Academic subjects? Write a passage about 200-250 words to justify your answer.

Should sports classes be sacrificed in High School so students can concentrate on Academic subjects? Write a passage about 200-250 words to justify your answer. 9QWG7
In today’s world, not only education is vital, but sports are also important. Some schools or colleges sacrificed sports because they think sports have nasty effects on the education of seed, but sports can lead many benefits to us. First of all, sports are part of our life. Sports bring many advantages for folk. Sport is a type of exercise. With the help of sports classes, children learn sports, if children take sports as a profession, they can earn money in future. Sports not only provide exercise, refreshment and help us maintain our physical body in a good shape but also our mind power and gain various skills such as sportsman spirit, decision making skill, etc. However, sports classes may be diverted children’s minds from education. Sometimes, they are tired due to the sport classes and could not focus on their education. If seed mainly focuses on sports classes, then there are chances to be failed in exams. But, according to psychology, folk needs a different test of life. So, with the help of sports, people fulfill their interests and can be better concentrate on education. To conclude, I would like to say that, education is really important for our success, but sports lessons are necessary to build a healthy environment, and to improve students’ strengths.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is vital,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
schools or colleges sacrificed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have nasty effects on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
of seed,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can lead
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to us.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are part of our life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages for folk.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sport
is a type of exercise. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
, children learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, if children take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
as a profession, they can earn money
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provide exercise, refreshment and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us maintain our physical body in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
shape
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
our mind power and gain various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as sportsman spirit,
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
decision making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
, etc.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
may
be diverted
children’s minds from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, they
are tired
due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
and could not focus on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. If seed
mainly
focuses on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
, then there are chances to
be failed
in exams.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, according to psychology, folk needs a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
of life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
fulfill their interests and can be better concentrate on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
To conclude
, I would like to say that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
really
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for our success,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
lessons are necessary to build a healthy environment, and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
students’ strengths.
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IELTS essay Should sports classes be sacrificed in High School so students can concentrate on Academic subjects? Write a passage about 200-250 words to justify your answer.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
216 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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