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SHOULD SMOKING BE BANNED IN PUBLIC AREAS?

SHOULD SMOKING BE BANNED IN PUBLIC AREAS? xxQ81
From my perspective, smoking should be entirely banned in public areas due to its nasty effects on our modern society. First of all, smoking is extremely harmful to our health since it can reduce life by 9-10 years. Medical research has proven that cigarettes contain about 600 ingredients, many of which are poisonous, and at least 69 substances linked to cancer, such as nicotine, acetone, tar, and carbon monoxide. Moreover, smoking also raises blood pressure, weakens blood vessel walls, and increases blood clots. Together, this raises your risk of stroke. You’re also at an increased risk of worsening breathing problems and heart diseases. Besides, a number of studies indicate that non-smoker is at twice the risk of developing a deadly smoking-related disease compared with the active smoker. Secondly, smoking has many negative effects on nature as it is a cause of pollution. Scientists have shown that cigarettes have approximately 4000 chemicals, which are breathed out and released into the air. Also, during the rainy season, there are more annual wildfires caused by smoker's debris than ones caused by natural sources according to recent reports. Furthermore, almost cigarette butts finally end up in lakes and rivers. As a result, fish and other aquatic animals are poisoned because they accidentally eat these butts. Last but not least, smoking contributes a significant burden on the budget. As its consumption leads to numerous diseases in both active smokers and passive smokers, smoking-related patients create major health care expenses which put pressure on their families. More dangerously, smoking has a destructive influence on teenagers. Young teens consider smoking a sign of their adolescence. Smoking should be banned in public areas because of its nasty effects.
From my perspective,
smoking
should be
entirely
banned in public areas due to its nasty effects on our modern society.

First of all
,
smoking
is
extremely
harmful to our health since it can
reduce
life by 9-10 years. Medical research has proven that cigarettes contain about 600 ingredients,
many
of which are poisonous, and at least 69 substances linked to cancer, such as nicotine, acetone, tar, and carbon monoxide.
Moreover
,
smoking
also
raises blood pressure, weakens blood vessel walls, and increases blood clots. Together, this raises your
risk
of stroke. You’re
also
at an increased
risk
of worsening breathing problems and heart diseases.
Besides
, a number of studies indicate that non-smoker is at twice the
risk
of developing a deadly smoking-related disease compared with the active smoker.

Secondly
,
smoking
has
many
negative
effects on nature as it is a cause of pollution. Scientists have shown that cigarettes have approximately 4000 chemicals, which
are breathed
out and released into the air.
Also
, during the rainy season, there are more annual wildfires caused by smoker's debris than ones caused by natural sources according to recent reports.
Furthermore
, almost cigarette butts
finally
end
up in lakes and rivers.
As a result
, fish and other aquatic animals
are poisoned
because
they
accidentally
eat these butts.

Last
but
not least,
smoking
contributes a significant burden on the budget. As its consumption leads to numerous diseases in both active smokers and passive smokers, smoking-related patients create major health care expenses which put pressure on their families. More
dangerously
,
smoking
has a destructive influence on
teenagers
. Young teens consider
smoking
a
sign
of their adolescence.

Smoking should
be banned
in public areas
because
of its nasty effects.
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IELTS essay SHOULD SMOKING BE BANNED IN PUBLIC AREAS?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
280 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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