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should invest to build a safer, faster and more reliable transportation system, and the railway, for this reason, should get an obvious priority.

should invest to build a safer, faster and more reliable transportation system, and the railway, for this reason, should get an obvious priority. wxpVE
In this modern world, it is stated by some politicians and authorities that if giant companies move their facilities with white-collar staff to the rural areas, transportation and housing problems could be vanished. I strongly agree with this statement First, since the beginning of the migration from rural areas to the cities, big cities has been facing displeasing traffic problems. In fact, this problem mostly occurs in before and after times of working hours. If those companies and their staffs move to the countryside, the density of the traffic would be decreased sharply. For instance, in Tashkent, still so many factories have been operating in the middle of the city and those factories cause the traffic jams, instead if there would be no factory anymore, not only the people but also whole city will be able to breathe finally. Besides the transportation problems, the other most important thing is housing problems. The rent and purchasing prices of a house have been increasing constantly, in fact, the rising rate is higher than the inflation rate. In other words, people who live in mega cities could not be able to compensate their monthly expenses. To decrease the prices of rent and purchasing, some people should move from big cities. Furthermore, scientists' experiences showed that, around 8 million people work for corporate companies. For instance, if all of them move from Fergana to rural areas, there would be a sufficient decrease in demand and due to that, renting and purchasing price will decrease too. Clearly, in the light of the information given above, giant factories located in major cities are one of the reasons of housing and traffic problems. I am strongly convinced that if those companies move their factories and related personnel to the countryside, many problems which are relatively to housing and traffic in big cities would be fixed.
In this modern world, it
is stated
by
some
politicians and authorities that if giant
companies
move
their facilities with white-collar staff to the rural areas, transportation and housing
problems
could
be vanished
. I
strongly
agree
with this
statement


First
, since the beginning of the migration from rural areas to the
cities
,
big
cities
has been facing displeasing
traffic
problems
. In fact, this
problem
mostly
occurs in
before
and after times of working hours. If those
companies
and their staffs
move
to the countryside, the density of the
traffic
would
be decreased
sharply
.
For instance
, in Tashkent,
still
so
many
factories
have been operating in the middle of the city and those
factories
cause the
traffic
jams,
instead
if there would be no
factory
anymore, not
only
the
people
but
also
whole city will be able to breathe
finally
.

Besides
the transportation
problems
, the other most
important
thing is housing
problems
. The rent and purchasing prices of a
house
have been increasing
constantly
, in fact, the rising rate is higher than the inflation rate.
In other words
,
people
who
live
in mega
cities
could not be able to compensate their monthly expenses. To decrease the prices of rent and purchasing,
some
people
should
move
from
big
cities
.
Furthermore
, scientists' experiences
showed
that, around 8 million
people
work for corporate
companies
.
For instance
, if all of them
move
from
Fergana
to rural areas, there would be a sufficient decrease in demand and due to that, renting and purchasing price will decrease too.

Clearly
, in the light of the information
given
above, giant
factories
located in major
cities
are one of the reasons of housing and
traffic
problems
. I am
strongly
convinced that if those
companies
move
their
factories
and related personnel to the countryside,
many
problems
which are
relatively
to housing and
traffic
in
big
cities
would be
fixed
.
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IELTS essay should invest to build a safer, faster and more reliable transportation system, and the railway, for this reason, should get an obvious priority.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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