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Crime rate has increased with the advancement of technology.

Crime rate has increased with the advancement of technology. wxp9d
there is no doubt that these days the crime rate has obviously increased and there is a current argument weather the technology improvement is behind that. I completely agree with this and i think crime level is higher after technology revolution. first of all, after technology enhancement everything is available online, nowadays people can buy anything using mouse and keyboard. in addition, online transactions usually need credit card details in order to finish the deals, this card details encourage the criminals to find a way to steal the credentials and to use the card to steal money or to buy online using victim credit and debit cards. Secondly, criminals nowadays start using internet to sell and to buy illegal products and stuff. For instance, social media websites provide the criminals a good chance to know more people and to offer them dangerous products like weapons and drugs. furthermore, new technology has given a good chance for criminals to use advance devices which helped them to hide form the Police and to be difficult to trace. in conclusion, I completely agree with the role of new technology in increasing crime levels in many societies. I think governments should educate the people about online criminals in general and to be careful from any doubtful websites.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
is no doubt that these days the crime rate has
obviously
increased and there is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
argument weather the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
improvement is behind that. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this and
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
crime level is higher after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
revolution.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
first of all
, after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
enhancement everything is available
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
, nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
anything using mouse and keyboard.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
addition,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
transactions
usually
need credit card
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
in order to finish the deals, this card
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
encourage the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
to find a way to steal the credentials and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the card to steal money or to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
using victim credit and debit cards.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
using internet to sell and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
illegal products and stuff.
For instance
, social media websites provide the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
chance to know more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and to offer them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
products like weapons and drugs.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
furthermore
, new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
chance for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
advance devices which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
form the Police and to be difficult to trace.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
conclusion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the role of new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in increasing crime levels in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
societies. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should educate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
in general
and to be careful from any doubtful websites.
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IELTS essay Crime rate has increased with the advancement of technology.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
213 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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