Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Should internet access be limited to secondary students/teenagers ?

Should internet access be limited to secondary students/teenagers? WmLkk
Nowadays, with developing of technology, student can access internet to connect with other people around the world and help them enhance their knowledge. However, in my opinion we should limit internet access of secondary students/teenagers. I will discuss some reason why we need to limit. Firstly, when teenager can access to the internet they can spend too much time to play games and can be addicted to the internet. Moreover, they can inmitate some bad behaviour from the game they play and become more violent. When they lose the games, they will play again until they win. Student also can have some health issues and loses distraction from their study because they always think about the games. Secondly, access internet can lead student to depression and loneliness. Some student can be very addictive, spending too much time with your virtual friends may keep away from their friends and family. They just sit down next to the computer or use the smartphone to access the internet. They don't have chance to face-to-face with other people and they will lose their ability to communicate. Although access internet can give student benefits to find new connections all over the world but they may find themselves disconnected from real-life friends. Finally, student can face with crime, hacking and cheating. With access to billions of computers, computer hackers and malicious users can hack accounts and steal personal information of student. There are a lot of websites so they don't know which one is safe, they just click and access to that website. Therefore, information or their devices will be damaged by viruses. Also, through Internet student also enables to cheat on their studies or find others on the Internet to do their homework. In conclusion, access to the internet have some negative effects but it still hava the importance in our lives. Therefore, family and school should educate students/teenagers how to access internet for their benefits, pay attention to them to help them use the internet in the best way.
Nowadays, with developing of technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
internet to connect with other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around the world and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them enhance their knowledge.
However
, in my opinion we should limit internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
of secondary students/
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. I will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reason why we need to limit.

Firstly
, when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to the internet they can spend too much time to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and can
be addicted
to the internet.
Moreover
, they can
Possible spelling mistake found.
inmitate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
from the game they play and become more violent. When they lose the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, they will play again until they win.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Student
also
can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
health issues and loses distraction from their study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
internet can lead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to depression and loneliness.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
addictive, spending too much time with your virtual friends may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
away from their friends and family. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
sit down
next
to the computer or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the smartphone to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
the internet. They don't have chance to face-to-face with other
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
people and
they will lose their ability to communicate. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
internet can give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
benefits to find new connections all over the world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they may find themselves disconnected from real-life friends.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
can face with crime, hacking and cheating. With
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to billions of computers, computer hackers and malicious users can hack accounts and steal personal information of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
websites
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they don't know which one is safe, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
click and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to that website.
Therefore
, information or their devices will
be damaged
by viruses.
Also
, through Internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
also
enables to cheat on their studies or find others on the Internet to do their homework.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to the internet have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
still
Possible spelling mistake found.
hava
the importance in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Therefore
, family and school should educate students/
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
how to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
internet for their benefits, pay attention to them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the internet in the best way.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Should internet access be limited to secondary students/teenagers?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
335 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 6band
    increase in population over urban areas is more what are causes and solution for this problem
    It is undeniably true that more than half of the population in every country is living in urban areas instead of villages. So, this results growing in number of people in towns. In this essay I will identify both the causes and solutions for growing lifestyle in cities. The increase of nuber of peo...
  • 5.5band
    Advertisement benefits and drawbacks
    Nowadays, in the present world a lot competitive attitude has taken place. Everyone wishes to be a step ahead than others. Due to this mentality advertisement proves itself best source. Advertisement proves itself very much useful in many ways to seek lost people, shops purchases, selling plots etc...
  • 6band
    Radio will no longer be able to hold its presence as television and Internet media will replace it very soon.
    The invention of new media has always posed a challenge to the older ones. The old medium is replaced by new one or losses its dominant position. However, many people forecast that radio will lose its prevalence due to the popularity of television and Internet. In my opinion, I wholeheartedly concur...
  • 6band
    Lifespan of people is deteriorating with technology.
    The standard lifespan of people is sure to deteriorate in the upcoming days as compared to what it is now. I agree with this statement because of our increasing dependency on continuous use of technology and consumption of harmful fast food. It is an undeniable fact that with the introduction of ma...
  • 5.5band
    Nowadays so many people are you expecting you to get the email
    In current times I have you on my classmates and I am going dagandin you have to get up at all and get back you up for a few minutes and get back to get my classmates who was the best way I can describe it I will try and get a few more days and I will begin them to you in advance for any time after ...
  • 6band
    cities are overcrowded these days
    The proliferation in the population became an acute menace of the world. Moreover, urban areas are enormously expanding and becoming congested. Although, this concern can be attributed to the whole host of reasons, we will ponder the necessary remedies that should be considered to address this probl...





Get more results for topic:
  • Should internet access be limited to secondary students/teenagers ?