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Should governments spend money on art, when they have so many other important issues and concerns? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is true that nowadays goverment spends a large part of its budget for both public services and art. While it is important to spend money on public services, I do not agree with the view of those who think spending money on the arts is a waste of money. To begin with, there are several reasons why government should spend money on public services. Firstly, it is most important spending money for medicine and education. If government ignore these fields, it would be disastrous for society. Let's take hospitals, if government don't meet their needs, they cannot help patients and their future may in danger. Simply the situation also the same at school. If they don't pay enough attention and money for education, children may not be properly educated. Additionally, with introducetion of highet salaries government organize better life condition for its citizens and with this the rate of poverty and crime may reduced. However, it does not mean that givernment should not spend money on the arts at all. There are also a number of advantages of art. First of all, with development of arts, for example paintings, musics and film industries, people acquire a chance fir pleasure. They can visit to cinema for watching movies or just listening musics as a recreational activity. Moreover, government might make a profit when they have world-class art industries. To illustrate, USA has been earning a lot of money for many years because of Hollywood, which is popular around the world. In conclusion, it seems to me that spending money for public services is vital part, I believe spending money on the arts is not waste of money due to its benefits.
It is true that nowadays
Possible spelling mistake found.
goverment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spends
a large part of its budget for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
. While it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the view of those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
is a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are several reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
.
Firstly
, it is
Did you mean “the most”?
most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for medicine and education. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
these fields, it would be disastrous for society.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
's take hospitals, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their needs, they cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
patients and their future may in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
.
Simply
the situation
also
the same at school. If they don't pay
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
attention and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for education, children may not be
properly
educated.
Additionally
, with
Possible spelling mistake found.
introducetion
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
highet
salaries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
organize better life condition for its citizens and with this the rate of poverty and crime may
Did you mean “be reduced”?
reduced
.
However
, it does not mean that
Possible spelling mistake found.
givernment
should not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
at all. There are
also
a number of advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
.
Often, this adverbial phrase is redundant. Consider using “first”.
First of all
, with development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
,
for example
paintings, musics and film industries,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
acquire a chance fir pleasure. They can visit to cinema for watching movies or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
listening musics as a recreational activity.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a profit when they have world-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
industries. To illustrate, USA has been earning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of Hollywood, which is popular around the world.
In conclusion
, it seems to me that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
is vital part, I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
is not waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
due to its benefits.
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IELTS essay Should governments spend money on art, when they have so many other important issues and concerns?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
281 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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