Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Shopping is the favorite pastime for most young people. Why do you think is? Do you think they should be encouraged to do other useful activities?

Shopping is the favorite pastime for most young people. Why do you think is? Do you think they should be encouraged to do other useful activities? M5De
Shopping is the most famous and preferred pastime among the younger generations. I think this is because they are exposed to marketing tactics from a very young age and are influenced by these tactics. I think that youngsters should be encouraged to focus on other useful activities for their benefit. Primarily, the principal reason why youngsters these days are all interested and prone to shopping is because of target marketing. Products these days are targeted and made appealing to the youth, especially fashion and technology. The advertisements and marketing have made the buying of goods and a part of life for everyone, especially the young minds. The recent generations are more prone to shopping as it is necessitated by peer pressure to stay updated with the recent trends. For instance, everyone feels the impulse to buy the most recent and updated smartphones. The younger generations must be encouraged to engage in other hobbies as shopping can develop into a dangerous addiction that can be financially detrimental to themselves and their families. Firstly, young adults and youngsters easily succumb to temptation and this might result in shopping for expensive products which they might not be able to afford. The youth must think practically and must engage in productive activities as hobbies that aid their development. For instance, exercising, sports, and yoga are activities that are beneficial to health. Also, these activities are economical and considered productive by consensus. To conclude, shopping is the most favored pastime for many youngsters. This is due to marketing as well as peer pressure. However, youth should indulge in other recreational activities which are beneficial to their health and well-being in general.
Shopping
is the most
famous
and preferred pastime among the younger generations. I
think
this is
because
they
are exposed
to
marketing
tactics from a
very
young age and
are influenced
by these tactics. I
think
that youngsters should
be encouraged
to focus on other useful
activities
for their benefit.

Primarily
, the principal reason why youngsters these days are all interested and prone to
shopping
is
because
of target
marketing
. Products these days
are targeted
and made appealing to the youth,
especially
fashion and technology. The advertisements and
marketing
have made the buying of
goods
and a part of life for everyone,
especially
the young minds. The recent generations are more prone to
shopping
as it
is necessitated
by peer pressure to stay updated with the recent trends.
For instance
, everyone feels the impulse to
buy
the most recent and updated smartphones.

The younger generations
must
be encouraged
to engage in other hobbies as
shopping
can develop into a
dangerous
addiction that can be
financially
detrimental to themselves and their families.
Firstly
, young adults and youngsters
easily
succumb to temptation and this might result in
shopping
for expensive products which they might not be able to afford. The youth
must
think
practically
and
must
engage in productive
activities
as hobbies that aid their development.
For instance
, exercising, sports, and yoga are
activities
that are beneficial to health.
Also
, these
activities
are economical and considered productive by consensus.

To conclude
,
shopping
is the most favored pastime for
many
youngsters. This is due to
marketing
as well
as peer pressure.
However
, youth should indulge in other recreational
activities
which are beneficial to their health and well-being
in general
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Shopping is the favorite pastime for most young people. Why do you think is? Do you think they should be encouraged to do other useful activities?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts