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Schools should stop using books for teaching children and use films ,tv and computer instead .To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Schools should stop using books for teaching children and use films, tv and computer instead. m1Gw1
It is undeniable that, in this newfangled era people use debatable nituon that school should utilize electonic methods to teach pupils instead of paper books. Un my perspective both methods are fuitful for the students because books can enhance the reading skills and with the help of electonic method children can understand better owing to hearing and visual tricks that i will explain in brief in upcoming sefements with a relevent conclusion On the one hand, books are very fruitful for tge students owung ti this it can enhance the ability of reading as well as catch the words in distinct vocabulary that will be benificial in writing and speaking modules. Moreover, with the help of reading books they can also learn about writing methods. To examplify, use of commas or brackets mainly in ligustic subjects. On the other hand, everyone know that this modern era is full of technology because it is a easy method to learn and teach. In electronic way students can learn easily with the help of 3d videos which reflects sound as well as pictures. Moving to the next, pupils find it intersting due to distinct way of teaching methods abd they able to learn well that help them to score good in the academic studies. Furthermore, videos can explain whole story into twn minutes instead of one or two days. To conclude, may people vary in their notions however, i believe that both are beneficial methods because both mwthods can enhance the ability of students in academic studies
It is undeniable that, in this newfangled era
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
debatable
Possible spelling mistake found.
nituon
that school should utilize
Possible spelling mistake found.
electonic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
to teach pupils
instead
of paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Un
my perspective both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
fuitful
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
can enhance the reading
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
electonic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
children can understand better owing to hearing and visual tricks that
Did you mean "I"?
i
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
in brief
in upcoming
Possible spelling mistake found.
sefements
with a
Possible spelling mistake found.
relevent
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
conclusion


On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
fruitful for
Possible spelling mistake found.
tge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
Possible spelling mistake found.
owung
ti this it can enhance the ability of reading
as well
as catch the words in distinct vocabulary that will be
Possible spelling mistake found.
benificial
in writing and speaking modules.
Moreover
, with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
they can
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
examplify
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of commas or brackets
mainly
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
ligustic
subjects.

On the other hand
, everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "knows", "knew".
know
that this modern era is full of technology
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
method
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
and teach. In electronic way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
easily
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of 3d videos which reflects sound
as well
as pictures. Moving to the
next
, pupils find it
Possible spelling mistake found.
intersting
due to distinct way of teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
Possible spelling mistake found.
abd
Did you mean "they are" or "they were"?
they
able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
well that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to score
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
in the academic studies.
Furthermore
, videos can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
whole story into
Possible spelling mistake found.
twn
minutes
instead
of one or two days.

To conclude
, may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
vary in their notions
however
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that both are beneficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
methods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
both
Possible spelling mistake found.
mwthods
can enhance the ability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in academic studies
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IELTS essay Schools should stop using books for teaching children and use films, tv and computer instead.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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