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Schools offer a wide range of courses, including mathematics, science and physical education. Among these subjects, some subjects such as physical education, music and history are less important and should be optional. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Schools offer a wide range of courses, including mathematics, science and physical education. Among these subjects, some subjects such as physical education, music and history are less important and should be optional. 2lEr6
Many people believe that students should pay less attention to the subjects of history, physical education and music. I personally disagree with the statement, since I believe that all subjects taught in school are equally important to students. On the one hand, it is a fact that all subjects delivered at school are significant. It plays a meaningful role for students when they grow up, even though each student will be specialized in some specific subject. For example, although a student might become a history teacher in the future, it is essential for him or her to learn about mathematics and science as well. As a teacher, he or she will be given other tasks besides teaching such as preparing the expenditure budget of his or her class for a year, which demand some accounting and calculation skills. Secondly, it is obvious that all individuals have their own different talents. Some students may have a personal interest in studying music, art-related subjects while others might have the passion in learning mathematics and science. And if the school only focuses on studying two or three particular subjects such as Math, science, physics then it would be unfair for students who have the passion in music, art, physical education. In conclusion, I do not approve that schools give less attention to the subjects of physical education, music and history and turn them into self-selected subjects.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should pay less attention to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
of history, physical education and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
. I
personally
disagree with the statement, since I believe that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
taught in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
are
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to students.

On the one hand, it is a fact that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
delivered at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
are significant. It plays a meaningful role for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
when they grow up,
even though
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
will
be specialized
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
.
For example
, although a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
might become a history teacher in the future, it is essential for him or her to learn about mathematics and science
as well
. As a teacher, he or she will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
other tasks
besides
teaching such as preparing the expenditure budget of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
for a year, which demand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
accounting and calculation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

Secondly
, it is obvious that all individuals have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
talents.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may have a personal interest in studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, art-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
while others might have the passion in learning mathematics and science. And if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focuses on studying two or three particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as Math, science, physics then it would be unfair for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who have the passion in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, art, physical education.

In conclusion
, I do not approve that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
give less attention to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
of physical education,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and history and turn them into self-selected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
.
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IELTS essay Schools offer a wide range of courses, including mathematics, science and physical education. Among these subjects, some subjects such as physical education, music and history are less important and should be optional.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
233 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Schools offer a wide range of courses, including mathematics, science and physical education. Among these subjects, some subjects such as physical education, music and history are less important and should be optional. To what extent do you agree or disagree?