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school time should be used in learning important subjects

school time should be used in learning important subjects A3e61
According to the research, some schools said that students should study the science of food and how to prepare it. From my point of view, it is important to expose to the student how to prepare the food in healthier and clean. In another opinion, some people say that school time should be used for learning important subjects only. Basically, it is important to develop both modules for the student. They might apply it in the future and also in their lives. Government should give exposure and encourage students to explore both either theory and practical. Some schools might teach students only basic subjects, like mathematics, science, history, and so on. In addition, the school also must be responsible to teach and gives exposure to the student about the social life, good and bad things they did in their daily lives. So that students can differentiate which one they should do and don't. For instance, in our current situation, there are a few problems in our countries such as LGBT, social issues, s and civic education in our country is getting worse. There are also have a lot of debates this day to incorporate new subjects in schools such as; LGBT education, manners, civic education, or intercultural communication classes. To summarize, I agree and open for change in our school and it is a way to go.
According to the research,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
said that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should study the science of food and how to prepare it. From my point of view, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to expose to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
how to prepare the food in healthier and clean. In another opinion,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
time should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for learning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
subjects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.

Basically
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to develop both modules for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
. They might apply it in the future and
also
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should give exposure and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to explore both either theory and practical.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
might teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
basic subjects, like mathematics, science, history, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be responsible to teach and gives exposure to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
about the social life,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
things they did in their daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can differentiate which one they should do and don't.

For instance
, in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation, there are a few problems in our countries such as LGBT, social issues, s and civic education in our country is getting worse. There are
also
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
debates this day to incorporate new subjects in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
such as; LGBT education, manners, civic education, or intercultural communication classes.

To summarize
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
and open for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and it is a way to go.
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IELTS essay school time should be used in learning important subjects

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
227 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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