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school organization system comparison

school organization system comparison GlY9j
The essay raises the issue of school organization system in the United States. The writer explains the basic school division into primary grades, intermediate grades and secondary grades in pupils aged 6 to 18. The lecturer questions the effectiveness of such system and continues to discuss the problems associated with it. First, the author states that the separation of students into the aforesaid grades are based on chronological age. The lecturer discusses how such classification fails to take into account individual social, physical and mental readiness of students. secondly, the essay mentions the repetition process that the students who do not succeed to meet the required qualifications have to undertake. The lecturer explains how this can lead to boredom, poor self-concept and dropout in the mentioned group of students. He then points out the different paces of learning in individual students and how standardized tests fail to measure these differences.
The essay raises the issue of school organization system in the United States. The writer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
the basic school division into primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grades
, intermediate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grades
and secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grades
in pupils aged 6 to 18.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
lecturer questions the effectiveness of such system and continues to discuss the problems associated with it.

First
, the author states that the separation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
into the aforesaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grades
are based
on chronological age. The lecturer discusses how such classification fails to take into account individual social, physical and mental readiness of students.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
secondly
, the essay mentions the repetition process that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who do not succeed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the required qualifications
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
undertake. The lecturer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
how this can lead to boredom, poor self-concept and dropout in the mentioned group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. He then points out the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
paces of learning in individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and how standardized
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
fail to measure these differences.

IELTS essay school organization system comparison

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
150 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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