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resposobility of the mother

resposobility of the mother KnLgN
The resposobility of the mother and the father in a children life is a very popular topic of these days. While some people try to prove that – because the baby came from th mother’s body, or the based on the tradiotional family model – the womans should carry most of the task that a parenthood mean. On the other hands there are a radically different aproach that says, the womans and the mens not just should be equal in the human rights but also should have equal amount part in their children’s life. I will outline both arguments and prove the more equal responsibility cause more balanced childrens too. One of the reasons, because may some part people think a mother could be more responsible with her babies and childrens is, while most of the research shows that a big portion of mens start to be became a father just right before their children born, the womans are start their preparation from child age. They start to play with toy babies and talk about those things that means to be a mother right from their childhood. On the other hand, boys play football or other competititve games in this age. A different aspect is that, while these games are reflecting a well proved model for rules of girls and boys in their society for sencturies, in the modern age we need to redefine the responsibilities of the parents. Nowdays, also mens and womans are working and the equality of the two sex are also changed. We should be represented more equaly in our childrens life than before. Some research says those children whoes parents could balance their task and be represented almost equal in thei childrend’s life, could reach fourty per cent more salary and feel themselfes happier than others. On balance, I think in the future womans and mans not just should be equal in their rights, but should carry equal responibilities and workloads as a parent too.
The
resposobility
of the
mother
and the father in a
children
life
is a
very
popular topic of these days. While
some
people
try to prove that
because
the baby came from
th
mother’s
body, or the based on the
tradiotional
family model
the
womans
should carry most of the task that a parenthood mean. On the other hands there are a
radically
different
aproach
that says, the
womans
and the
mens not
just
should be
equal
in the human
rights
but
also
should have
equal
amount part in their
children’s
life
. I will outline both arguments and prove the more
equal
responsibility cause more balanced
childrens
too.

One of the reasons,
because
may
some
part
people
think
a
mother
could be more responsible with her babies and
childrens
is, while most of the research
shows
that a
big
portion of
mens
start
to be
became
a father
just
right
before
their
children
born, the
womans
are
start
their preparation from child age. They
start
to play with toy babies and talk about those things that means to be a
mother
right
from their childhood.
On the other hand
, boys play football or other
competititve
games in this age.

A
different
aspect is that, while these games are reflecting a well proved model for
rules
of girls and boys in their society for
sencturies
, in the modern age we need to redefine the responsibilities of the parents.
Nowdays
,
also
mens
and
womans
are working and the equality of the two sex are
also
changed
. We should
be represented
more
equaly
in our
childrens
life
than
before
.
Some
research says those
children
whoes
parents could balance their task and
be represented
almost
equal
in
thei
childrend
’s
life
, could reach
fourty
per cent more salary and feel
themselfes
happier than others.

On balance, I
think
in the future
womans
and
mans
not
just
should be
equal
in their
rights
,
but
should carry
equal
responibilities
and workloads as a parent too.
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IELTS essay resposobility of the mother

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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