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Research says more and more business training and business meeting taking place online. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Research says more and more business training and business meeting taking place online. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? LJMr
The contemporary society is pushed by the internet, more and more companies have been taking advantage of this development by making work from home a norm. In the below essay, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages will be agreed upon by analysis. On the one hand, online meeting and training have myriad advantages, Firstly, companies would have no restrain like physical location holding them back. For example, employs can be hired from different places of the globe, furthermore, new employs can be trained by teachers from other side of the globe within the comfort of their home, online conference among the teachers and the students could help address some serious issues. Secondly, online working and meetings have a cost effective characteristics. For instance, physical meetings, accommodation would no doubt require more funds than online meetings. Thirdly, online meetings and training would me more flexible with time management, subsequently, resulting in a better experience over-all for the new employ, as he or she can mange his time more productively, compared to wasting it over traveling. This can help employees prioritize job at the right time. On the other hand, more and more meetings have been taking place online. This could shake the fundamentals of corporate world, jeopardize enterprise culture. For example, loyalty, team-spirit, unity might be lost, as a result companies morals can not be followed. Employees are interested in pursuing their own interest, but not devote their knowledge and skill for the betterment of the organization. However, companies who are willing to pursue maximizing their efforts towards online worlds could potentially over come this draw backs. For example, orientation programs are meant to make the employees feel a sense of belonging. In conclusion, It is my strong opinion that every company should tend to this method of online training and meeting.
The contemporary society
is pushed
by the internet, more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
have been taking advantage of this development by making work from home a norm. In the below essay, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
upon by analysis.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
and training have myriad advantages,
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
would have no restrain like physical location holding them back.
For example
, employs can
be hired
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places of the globe,
furthermore
, new employs can
be trained
by teachers from other side of the globe within the comfort of their home,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
conference among the teachers and the students could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
address
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious issues.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
working and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
have a cost effective
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "characteristic"?
characteristics
.
For instance
, physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
, accommodation would no doubt require more funds than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
.
Thirdly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
and training would me more flexible with time management,
subsequently
, resulting in a better experience over-all for the new employ, as he or she can mange his time more
productively
, compared to wasting it over traveling. This can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
employees prioritize job at the right time.

On the other hand
, more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meetings
have been taking place
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. This could shake the fundamentals of corporate world, jeopardize enterprise culture.
For example
, loyalty, team-spirit, unity might
be lost
,
as a result
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
morals can not
be followed
. Employees
are interested
in pursuing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
interest,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not devote their knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
for the betterment of the organization.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
who are willing to pursue maximizing their efforts towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
worlds could
potentially
over
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
this draw backs.
For example
, orientation programs
are meant
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the employees feel a sense of belonging.

In conclusion
, It is my strong opinion that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
should tend to this method of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
training and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meeting
.

IELTS essay Research says more and more business training and business meeting taking place online. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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