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Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence?

Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence? ddmp
Recent investigation maintains that our temperament and improvement are affected more significantly through our qualities we are born with rather than happenings that we face frequently throughout all our period time. This essay strongly disagrees that anyhow, circumstances have a great essence in our growth or productivity. Firstly, this essay will discuss the main benefit of experiences in our connections and behaviour and secondly, will show how these experiences give successful directions. First and foremost, experiences we faced give us a great opportunity to strengthen our social bonds in the workforce. As a result, a skillful person could take the other part of the company being advantageous among others. In terms of it becomes beneficial for the corporation. These humans have an essential sense of respect among their colleagues due to their excellent skills. In other words, their actions or behaviour could be repeated by others which has a major role in forming their personality. For example, according to a survey held in ‘Teta’ company in India, the great percentage of experienced people predominates over others’ behaviour. On the other hand, being so knowledgeable these people act wisely in any case, especially about their lives or careers. Moreover, they could estimate future concerns and using their experience they could solve them so easily. Day by day due to increasing accomplishment people change their detrimental habits making more effort. These experiences might give great contributions to society’s development as well. For instance, statistics shows that all over the world, knowledge could give a hand to 6 out of 10 people to do the right decisions to possess a better life in the future. In conclusion, I disagree that traits we are born with have a far more impact on our attitudes than occurrences we have in our life. In any case, occurrences could be more advantageous in many aspects such as creating strong associations and providing straight recommendations.
Recent investigation maintains that our temperament and improvement are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
more
significantly
through our qualities we
are born
with
rather
than happenings that we face
frequently
throughout all our period time. This essay
strongly
disagrees that anyhow, circumstances have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
essence in our growth or productivity.
Firstly
, this essay will discuss the main benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
in our connections and
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
and
secondly
, will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
how these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
successful directions.

First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
we faced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
us a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
opportunity to strengthen our social bonds in the workforce.
As a result
, a skillful person could take the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
part of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
being advantageous among others. In terms of it becomes beneficial for the corporation. These humans have an essential sense of respect among their colleagues due to their excellent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, their actions or
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
could
be repeated
by others which has a major role in forming their personality.
For example
, according to a survey held in ‘
Possible spelling mistake found.
Teta
’
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
in India, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
percentage of experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
predominates over others’
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
knowledgeable these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
act
wisely
in any case,
especially
about their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
or careers.
Moreover
, they could estimate future concerns and using their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
they could solve them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
easily
. Day by day due to increasing accomplishment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their detrimental habits making more effort. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
might
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
contributions to society’s development
as well
.
For instance
, statistics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that all over the world, knowledge could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
a hand to 6 out of 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to do the right decisions to possess a better life in the future.

In conclusion
, I disagree that traits we
are born
with have a far more impact on our attitudes than occurrences we have in our life. In any case, occurrences could be more advantageous in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects such as creating strong associations and providing straight recommendations.
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IELTS essay Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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