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Recent research has confirmed that human activity has become the greatest threat to plant and animal life Why do you think this has happened How can we reduce our impact on the natural world v.2

Recent research has confirmed that human activity has become the greatest threat to plant and animal life Why do you think this has happened How can we reduce our impact on the natural world v. 2
These days, there are many environmental issues on our planet. While some people argue that the major problem is the loss of the flora and the fauna, others believe that there are far more significant environmental problems. There are valid views on both sides, which I will discuss now. On the one hand, there is substantial loss of many plant and animal species throughout the world. These species are crucial to maintain a balance within the ecosystem. Without them, the ecosystem is disturbed with devastating effects on all living and non-living things which are interdependent. For example, plants are the producers of food in nature and without them, survival of many species which usually depend on them will be threatened. It is also worth noting that plants and animals are important for water and air purification as well as flood control. Furthermore, there is an increasing number of endangered animals nowadays and even some have become extinct such as the Hawaiian snail which is the last group of animal recorded to have disappeared from the Earth’s surface. On the other hand, another important environmental problem we are facing today is global warming. With the increase in temperature due to excessive carbon dioxide emission, ice bergs are melting at a much faster rate resulting in a rise in sea levels which threatens the disappearance of low lying islands. According to climate scientists based on a recent discovery, the world’s biggest iceberg in Antarctica is about to enter the open ocean which would cause an even higher increase in sea levels and put countries such as Brunei and Vietnam as risk. Additionally, air pollution still challenges the environment in many big cities with direct effects on wildlife. When the harmful gases combine with rain water, they give rise to acid rain which destroy aquatic life and damages buildings. In conclusion, I believe that the loss of the flora and fauna is a serious issue but not as serious as global warming and air pollution. The two latter environmental problems are the most important ones and if appropriate actions are not taken, we will all perish.
These days, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
issues on our planet. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is the loss of the flora and the fauna, others believe that there are far more significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. There are valid views on both sides, which I will discuss
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.

On the one hand, there is substantial loss of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
plant and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
species throughout the world. These species are crucial to maintain a balance within the ecosystem. Without them, the ecosystem
is disturbed
with devastating effects on all living and non-living things which are interdependent.
For example
, plants are the producers of food in nature and without them, survival of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
species which
usually
depend on them will
be threatened
. It is
also
worth noting that plants and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for water and air purification
as well
as flood control.
Furthermore
, there is an increasing number of endangered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
nowadays and even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
have become extinct such as the Hawaiian snail which is the last group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
recorded to have disappeared from the Earth’s surface.

On the other hand
, another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
we are facing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is global warming. With the increase in temperature due to excessive carbon dioxide emission, ice bergs are melting at a much faster rate resulting in a rise in sea levels which threatens the disappearance of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
low lying
islands. According to climate scientists based on a recent discovery, the world’s biggest iceberg in Antarctica is about to enter the open ocean which would cause an even higher increase in sea levels and put countries such as Brunei and Vietnam as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
.
Additionally
, air pollution
still
challenges the environment in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities with direct effects on wildlife. When the harmful gases combine with rain water, they give rise to acid rain which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
aquatic life and damages buildings.

In conclusion
, I believe that the loss of the flora and fauna is a serious issue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not as serious as global warming and air pollution. The two latter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
ones and if appropriate actions are not taken, we will all perish.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Recent research has confirmed that human activity has become the greatest threat to plant and animal life Why do you think this has happened How can we reduce our impact on the natural world v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
353 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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