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reason why animals go extict

reason why animals go extict PEaYw
Every year, more and more animals are in danger of going extinct. The first and common way creatures go extinct is the extinction by natural causes. They may die out naturally due to the fact of climate change, a war with another beast, or a decrease in the food supply. On the contrary, over the last couple hundred years, humans have been given a run for their money as the biggest cause of annihilation. They have hunted lots of animals for their fur, feathers, and horns, leading to the disappearance of numerous species. We can take the passenger pigeon for example. In the late 1400s, there were 3-5 billion of them. Then, by the 1800s, hunting and eating passenger pigeons was suddenly widespread in the U. S. Because of this act, this breed became extinct in 1914. Furthermore, the habitat loss of a youth problem. People build giant farms to grow food. This makes natural land animals rely on and is destroyed. In addition, pollution of those farms poisons the land, air and especially water. And has at least 700 marine species in the brink of extinction such as blue sea slug, giant otter, and pteropod. Tigers, elephants, and rhino even the mightiest animals are at risk of elimination.
Every year, more and more
animals
are in
danger
of going extinct. The
first
and common way creatures go extinct is the extinction by natural causes. They may
die
out
naturally
due to the fact of climate
change
, a war with another beast, or a decrease in the food supply.
On the contrary
, over the last couple hundred years, humans have been
given
a run for their money as the biggest cause of annihilation. They have hunted lots of
animals
for their fur, feathers, and horns, leading to the disappearance of numerous species. We can take the passenger pigeon
for example
. In the late 1400s, there were 3-5 billion of them. Then, by the 1800s, hunting and eating passenger pigeons was
suddenly
widespread in the U. S.
Because of this
act, this breed became extinct in 1914.
Furthermore
, the habitat loss of a youth problem.
People
build giant farms to grow food. This
makes
natural land
animals
rely on and is
destroyed
.
In addition
, pollution of those farms poisons the land, air and
especially
water. And has at least 700 marine species in the brink of extinction such as blue sea slug, giant otter, and
pteropod
. Tigers, elephants, and rhino even the mightiest
animals
are at
risk
of elimination.
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IELTS essay reason why animals go extict

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
209 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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