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Reading comics only rot the children's mind than to provide any good education.

Reading comics only rot the children's mind than to provide any good education. dR5K
"Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body" were some inspiring words by Sir Richard Steele. Books are portals that transport our minds to new worlds. Parents might want their children to focus on academic books, but I believe otherwise. Reading books other than the ones that are a part of our curriculum has many benefits than one is aware of. Comic books are a great way to get children habituated to reading. They not only have easy language to begin with but also have captivating art which grabs their attention and keeps the hooked. By reading a variety of books, kids learn about the world outside of their own. They learn about various places and their people and culture. Furthermore. children understand the importance of good morals through such books. However, it is definitely a matter of concern if children read comics or novels all day as it may affect their grades in school. Therefore, parents must help keep a balance between studies and entertainment books. In conclusion, it is my opinion that reading enhances a child's vocabulary, concentration levels, and helps develop basic life skills. Hence I disagree that reading comics rots children's minds.
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
inspiring words by Sir Richard Steele.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Books
are portals that transport our minds to new worlds. Parents might want their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to focus on academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe
otherwise
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
other than the ones that are a part of our curriculum has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits than one is aware of.

Comic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are a great way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
habituated to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
. They not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have easy language to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
have captivating art which grabs their attention and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
the hooked.

By
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, kids learn about the world
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "outside".
outside of
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. They learn about various places and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and culture.
Furthermore
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
children
understand the importance of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
morals through such books.

However
, it is definitely a matter of concern if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
read comics or novels all day as it may affect their grades in school.
Therefore
, parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a balance between studies and entertainment books.

In conclusion
, it is my opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
enhances a child's vocabulary, concentration levels, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
develop basic life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
I disagree that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
comics rots children's minds.
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IELTS essay Reading comics only rot the children's mind than to provide any good education.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
199 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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