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Process of making raisins from grapes

Process of making raisins from grapes XoYbq
The process of harvesting grapes begins when the grapes are collected from. The second phase of producing raisins is drying for two and three weeks under the sunshine. When the raisins dry, they are packed in boxes and taken by truck to the transportation plant. After that, the raisins go through a clean, removing the ingredients and washing them in a washer. Flowing by this, it is stored into two ingredients by size, including smaller raisins and large raisins. Finally, small raisins are sold to grocery stores and larger packages raisins to be sold to commercial bakeries or to be exported to other countries.
The process of harvesting grapes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
when the grapes
are collected
from. The second phase of producing raisins is drying for two and three weeks under the sunshine. When the raisins dry, they
are packed
in boxes and taken by truck to the transportation plant. After that, the raisins go through a clean, removing the ingredients and washing them in a washer. Flowing by this, it
is stored
into two ingredients by size, including smaller raisins and large raisins.
Finally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
raisins
are sold
to grocery stores and larger packages raisins to
be sold
to commercial bakeries or to
be exported
to other countries.

IELTS essay Process of making raisins from grapes

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
104 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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