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‘Prisons are an expensive way of making bad people worse’ To what extent do you agree or disagree?

‘Prisons are an expensive way of making bad people worse’ rjNN
There are several generally accepted beliefs about prison. Firstly, that prison is a social defence against anti-social people. In short, it keeps us safe. Secondly that prison punishes wrongdoers through their loss of freedom. Thirdly that it teaches convicts the error of their ways, so that when they are released, they can enter back into daily life as law-abiding citizens. However, there is growing evidence that prison is not always the best solution to the problems of crime that we face. Several scientific studies have shown that prison is not nearly as beneficial to society as we might imagine. There are several explanations for this. The difficult conditions in most prisons mean that criminals rarely receive a positive education. Rather, they spend their time inside with other prisoners who teach them the tricks of their trade. Also, when they are released, it is very difficult for them to find a job, so they often feel that they have no choice but to reoffend. It’s the only thing they know. So the truth is that they are more likely to commit crimes again when they are released than if they hadn’t been sent to prison in the first place. As a society, we have to pay attention to the results of these findings. In practice, we may be a lot safer if we give criminals the ability to gain the practical skills they need to get a job and live successful, productive lives, rather than just locking them away. There is little proof that prison works. Perhaps now is the time for us to take important decisions regarding our system of punishment. At the very least we need to give it more thought. It could be a matter of life and death.
There are several
generally
accepted
beliefs about
prison
.
Firstly
, that
prison
is a social
defence
against anti-social
people
. In short, it
keeps
us safe.
Secondly
that
prison
punishes wrongdoers through their loss of freedom.
Thirdly
that it teaches convicts the error of their ways,
so
that when they
are released
, they can enter back into daily life as law-abiding citizens.

However
, there is growing evidence that
prison
is not always the best solution to the problems of crime that we face. Several scientific studies have shown that
prison
is not
nearly
as beneficial to society as we might imagine. There are several explanations for this.

The difficult conditions in most
prisons
mean that criminals rarely receive a
positive
education.
Rather
, they spend their time inside with other prisoners who teach them the tricks of their trade.
Also
, when they
are released
, it is
very
difficult for them to find a job,
so
they
often
feel that they have no choice
but
to
reoffend
. It’s the
only
thing they know.
So
the truth is that they are more likely to commit crimes again when they
are released
than if they hadn’t been
sent
to
prison
in the
first
place.

As a society, we
have to
pay attention to the results of these findings. In practice, we may be a lot safer if we give criminals the ability to gain the practical
skills
they need to
get
a job and
live
successful, productive
lives
,
rather
than
just
locking them away. There is
little
proof that
prison
works. Perhaps
now
is the time for us to take
important
decisions regarding our system of punishment. At the
very
least we need to give it more
thought
. It could be a matter of life and death.
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IELTS essay ‘Prisons are an expensive way of making bad people worse’

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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