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Printed books and magazines have lost their importance

Printed books and magazines have lost their importance 9dEX
It is true that technological innovations like computers and the internet have made books and newspapers less important. When people can find all information online, they have hardly any incentive to buy books or magazines. This, however, does not mean that books have lost all of their relevance. In my opinion, books are still relevant to a certain extent. Billions of people living in many parts of the world still do not have access to the internet. They need magazines and newspapers to know what is happening around the world. Books are easy on the eye. Computers can lead to several visual problems. Young children, in particular, should not be allowed to stare at a computer for hours on end. There is no denying the fact that internet has made information readily available at our fingertips. Gone are the days when students had to frequent libraries to find information for their research projects. In addition, most of the information available online is free and can be accessed by anyone who owns a computer and an internet connection. Books and magazines, on the other hand, are not free. They are not exactly environment friendly either. Paper is made from wood and to make paper, you have to cut trees. Also books have a short shelf life. Although they can last decades, they are not indestructible. By contrast, information posted online will be there for all eternity. Also portable mobile devices like tablets and laptops eliminate the need to go about classrooms luging heavy books. It is not hard to see that information technology has made books and newspapers less important. This, however, does not mean that they have become totally irrelevant. A lot of people begin their day reading their favourite newspaper. To conclude, books and magazines may have lost some of their relevance, but it is impossible to claim that technology has made them redundant.
It is true that technological innovations like computers and the internet have made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
less
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can find all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
online, they have hardly any incentive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
. This,
however
, does not mean that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
have lost all of their relevance. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are
still
relevant to a certain extent.

Billions of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parts of the world
still
do not have access to the internet. They need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
to know what is happening around the world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Books
are easy on the eye. Computers can lead to several visual problems. Young children,
in particular
, should not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to stare at a computer for hours on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.

There is no denying the fact that internet has made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
readily
available at our fingertips. Gone
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "is".
are
the days when students had to frequent libraries to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
for their research projects.
In addition
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
available online is free and can
be accessed
by anyone who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owns
a computer and an internet connection.

Books and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
,
on the other hand
, are not free. They are not exactly environment friendly either. Paper
is made
from wood and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
paper, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
trees.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
have a short shelf life. Although they can last decades, they are not indestructible. By contrast,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
posted online will be there for all eternity.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
portable mobile devices like tablets and laptops eliminate the need to go about classrooms
Possible spelling mistake found.
luging
heavy books.

It is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
technology has made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
less
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. This,
however
, does not mean that they have become
totally
irrelevant.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
A lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
their day reading their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
.
To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
may have lost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of their relevance,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is impossible to claim that technology has made them redundant.
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IELTS essay Printed books and magazines have lost their importance

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
315 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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