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People who have original ideas are of much greater value to society than those who are simply able to copy the ideas of others well. v.2

People who have original ideas are of much greater value to society than those who are simply able to copy the ideas of others well. v. 2
People are born with different abilities and talents. Some being unique and some are common to all. Sometimes those with unique talents come up with ideas that are completely new, creative and astonishing. However, there lingers this question “Are they greater than us? “. In my honest opinion, every single human being should be treated and valued the same. No single person is greater than another. From the start of the human race to the present, no society was made by one man. It has always being a combined and a collective effort of everyone. Sir Isaac Newton, the great physicist was someone who revolutionised the field of physics. Every single individual respects and acknowledges him for his achievements and contribution to the human race. But does that mean only people of his stature are needed in the society? I say NO. Ideas of Newton have been taken by other individuals to come up with wonders that even Newton could not have imagined of. The Space Shuttles, Aircraft, Architectures, Construction, Sports are all based on ideas of another person. The computer was a machine that was created by an individual. However, this idea was copied by others to build things which are even greater. From simple electronics like calculators to marvels such as supercomputers, Artificial Intelligence, Robots. As a conclusion, like Ying and Yang, a society co-exists with the talents and ideas of all people combined. No individual is of much greater value than another. The day society starts considering that people with original ideas are of much greater value, will be the downfall of that society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are born
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
abilities and talents.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
being unique and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are common to all.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
those with unique talents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
that are completely new, creative and astonishing.
However
, there lingers this question “Are they greater than us? “.

In my honest opinion, every single human being should
be treated
and valued the same. No single person is greater than another. From the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the human race to the present, no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
was made
by one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
. It has always being a combined and a collective effort of everyone.

Sir Isaac Newton, the great physicist was someone who
Possible spelling mistake. 'revolutionised' is British English.
revolutionised
the field of physics. Every single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
respects and acknowledges him for his achievements and contribution to the human race.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
does that mean
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of his stature
are needed
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
? I say NO.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Ideas
of Newton have
been taken
by other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with wonders that even Newton could not have imagined of. The Space Shuttles, Aircraft, Architectures, Construction, Sports are all based on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
of another person. The computer was a machine that
was created
by an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
.
However
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
idea
was copied
by others to build things which are even greater. From simple electronics like calculators to marvels such as supercomputers, Artificial Intelligence, Robots.

As a conclusion, like
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ying
and Yang, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
co-exists with the talents and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
combined. No
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
is of much greater value than another. The day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
considering that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with original
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
are of much greater value, will be the downfall of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay People who have original ideas are of much greater value to society than those who are simply able to copy the ideas of others well. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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