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People who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyles and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Studies show that there are certain people who tend to get ill more frequently by adopting inadequate living habits. Does that mean such individuals should pay more for health care facilities? I believe that this has become a common issue and thus, making health care expensive is not the right way to go about it. In recent times, the number of people with an unhealthy lifestyle has been increasing at an alarming rate. This is due to the growth in the fast food industry and the advancement in technology. The higher consumption of fast foods and other chemical induced products has resulted in chronic diseases amongst people. Although there are many benefits of technology but it has introduced ways to be less active. However, if the government starts charging people who get ill by indulging in an inactive lifestyle or consuming nutrition-deprived foods, it is not guaranteed that people will change their choices. Also, in many developing countries, many people would not be able to afford it, which would be harmful to the economy in the long run. Having said that, if people are to pay more for their unhealthy lifestyle and poor diet they might be forced to change their way of living. However, this is very subjective because as mentioned earlier, results are not guaranteed to be impactful. In conclusion, if the government and health care workers raise awareness in people regarding the benefits of a healthy lifestyle, and the dangers of their current lifestyle, it would be beneficial for society as well as the economy.
Studies
show
that there are certain
people
who tend to
get
ill more
frequently
by adopting inadequate living habits. Does that mean such individuals should pay more for health care facilities? I believe that this has become a common issue and
thus
, making health care expensive is not the right way to go about it.

In recent times, the number of
people
with an unhealthy
lifestyle
has been increasing at an alarming rate. This is due to the growth in the
fast
food industry and the advancement in technology. The higher consumption of
fast
foods and other chemical induced products has resulted in chronic diseases amongst
people
. Although there are
many
benefits of technology
but
it has introduced ways to be less active.
However
, if the
government
starts
charging
people
who
get
ill by indulging in an inactive
lifestyle
or consuming nutrition-deprived foods, it is not guaranteed that
people
will
change
their choices.
Also
, in
many
developing countries
,
many
people
would not be able to afford it, which would be harmful to the economy in the long run.

Having said that, if
people
are to pay more for their unhealthy
lifestyle
and poor diet they might
be forced
to
change
their way of living.
However
, this is
very
subjective
because
as mentioned earlier, results are not guaranteed to be impactful.

In conclusion
, if the
government
and health care workers raise awareness in
people
regarding the benefits of a healthy
lifestyle
, and the
dangers
of their
current
lifestyle
, it would be beneficial for society
as well
as the economy.
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IELTS essay People who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyles and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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