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are computers an essential feature of modern education? what subjects can be better taught using computers? are thee aspects of a good education that cannot be taught using computers?

These days, technology plays a big role in our daily lives. Especially in the midst of this pandemic, many people are using computers for working and studying. Yet, not every subject can be learnt by computers. To begin with, gadgets are very important because it will affect our activities. For example, because of the virus, school students have to buy gadget so that they can study online. This is a part of modern education that government made. Honestly, I am pretty sure that even though students can go offline school, they still need gadgets because many assignments will be sent through email by our teachers, which is we should have gadgets. I personally think that many young people will have their own gadgets as technology became more develop. On the other hand, just some subjects that can be studied online by students. For instance, in physical exercise, teachers will be hard to get students score. Despite they went on a zoom call or video call, it will make things complicated. Teachers cannot see the students whether they take the exercise seriously or not. It also makes students hard because they have to put their gadgets in a good position, so that the teachers can see them clearly. Then, not only in physical exercise, but also in music. Based on my experience, it was so hard to do choir. Many problems came, such as the poor connection and computers audio. As a consequence, we could not record it. However, there are also some subjects that students can learnt by computers. For example, in maths and economics. They still can study through zoom call, they also can ask their teachers if they did not understand. Actually, I think it will be easier for those subjects to study by online, it will make people braver to ask something because they will feel shy to ask in school. In conclusion, computers give us many benefits. As technology is advancing, people can feel the modern technology and their job can be easier.
These days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
plays a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
role in our daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Especially
in the midst of this pandemic,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are using computers for working and studying.
Yet
, not every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
can be
Possible spelling mistake. ‘learnt’ is British English.
learnt
by computers.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will affect our activities.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the virus, school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadget
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can study online. This is a part of modern education that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
made.
Honestly
, I am pretty sure that
even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can go offline school, they
still
need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
assignments will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
through email by our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
, which
The pronoun ‘is’ must be used with “are”.
is
we should have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
. I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
became more develop.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that can
be studied
online by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
For instance
, in physical exercise,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
score. Despite they went on a
Did you mean the communication tool “Zoom” (= proper noun, capitalized)?
zoom
call or video call, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
things complicated.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Teachers
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
whether they take the exercise
seriously
or not. It
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
put their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
position,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
them
clearly
. Then, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in physical exercise,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in music. Based on my experience, it was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to do choir.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
problems came, such as the poor connection and computers audio. As a consequence, we could not record it.

However
, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
The modal verb ‘can’ requires the verb’s base form.
learnt
by computers.
For example
, in
Possible spelling mistake. ‘maths’ is British English.
maths
and economics. They
still
can study through
Did you mean the communication tool “Zoom” (= proper noun, capitalized)?
zoom
call, they
also
can ask their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
if they did not understand. Actually, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it will be easier for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
to study by online, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
braver to ask something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will feel shy to ask in school.

In conclusion
, computers give us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is advancing,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can feel the modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and their job can be easier.
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IELTS essay are computers an essential feature of modern education? what subjects can be better taught using computers? are thee aspects of a good education that cannot be taught using computers?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
337 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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