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people who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyles and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Health is wealth is one of the famous proverb which emphasizes on the value of health. Some says that those people who adopts unhealthy lifestyle and poor dits have to pay extra for health care. I completely agree with this statement. Firstly, nowadays people are damn busy in earning money that they are neglecting their health. But at the end these are the only people who have to use their saved money to gain their health. How ridiculous is it! These persons do not adopt any good life styles and just focus on eating junks. For example, majority of job holders could not find time to have some exercise or some yoga classess. They are still on the poor life style. On the other hand, majority of people have to pay more for health as they are damn busy in theirbad routines and do not even try to change it. In retuen their lifes become more stressful and bully. Such as, every person who have to spend major hours on working then come home stressful eat, spend time with family then sleep and repeat. Such person has to pay in case of medicines and diagnosis. However, there are number of people who could not pay attention to their daily routine and diets but they still live long. As their routine is unintentially fitted in healthy one. One of the fine example is farmers and labours. they just adopt a ordinary routine but they are closer to nature as its one of the famous saying, closer to nature means closer to perfection. To conclude, It is not wrong to say that maximun people are just used to their hectic routine and they have to pay at last. I am totally up with this statement that lack of diet and poor way of living cost hardly. So people have to change their priorities and find time for their health.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
is wealth is one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
proverb which emphasizes on the value of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
says that those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Did you mean “adopt”? Alternatively, check whether the singular of ‘people’ should be used.
adopts
unhealthy lifestyle and poor
Possible spelling mistake found.
dits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
extra for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement.

Firstly
, nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are damn busy in earning money that they are neglecting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
these are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their saved money to gain their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. How ridiculous is it! These persons do not adopt any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This noun is normally spelled as one word.
life styles
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
focus on eating junks.
For example
,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
job holders could not find time to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
exercise or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
yoga
Possible spelling mistake found.
classess
. They are
still
on the poor
This noun is normally spelled as one word.
life style
.

On the other hand
,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
more for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
as they are damn busy in
Possible spelling mistake found.
theirbad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routines
and do not even try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
it. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
retuen
their
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean “lives”, the plural form of the noun ‘life’?
lifes
become more stressful and bully. Such as, every person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend major hours on working then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
home stressful eat, spend time with family then sleep and repeat. Such person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
in case of medicines and diagnosis.

However
, there are
It seems that an article is missing. Did you mean “a number of”?
number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
could not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
attention to their daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routine
and diets
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
long.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routine
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
unintentially
fitted in healthy one. One of the fine example is farmers and
Possible spelling mistake. ‘labours’ is British English.
labours
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
adopt
Use “an” instead of ‘a’ if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. ‘an article’, ‘an hour’.
a
ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
routine
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are closer to nature as its one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
saying, closer to nature means closer to perfection.

To conclude
, It is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
to say that
Possible spelling mistake found.
maximun
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to their hectic
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
routine and
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
at last. I am
totally
up with this statement that lack of diet and poor way of living cost
The adverb ‘hardly’ is usually not used at the end of a sentence.
hardly
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their priorities and find time for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
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IELTS essay people who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyles and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
317 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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