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People today are able to take out loans from the bank or get a credit card very easily. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this practice?

It is increasingly common for people to take out debits from the bank at present time and using a credit card is sort of this act. This essay will highlight some of the benefits and drawbacks that I have resulted from this switch. Looking firstly the advantages, people`s life is basicer so they can possess all properties such a house, a car and something else thanks to credits and cards. In the past, before this system people was saving money to buy what they need, and this was be able to take lots of time due to the cost of item on the contrary, nowadays they can get a credit, can purchase what they desire and pay it next years. For instance, even if they have bought a store, a place or a car for earning money in this case, they can earn money and pay the loans at the same time. However, sometimes, people who owe the bank or use a credit card more than usual can lose everything they possess. I mean, when you get a debit from a bank, you have to sign a contract and after this process, you pay a certain amount of money bank every month. If you have not a condition doing it, bank has a right to owe your all properties in exchange for your dept. As a result, when you have a purpose to get a credit, you need to be prepared to give back the money of banks. In conclusion, we seen that there are a number of advantages and disadvantages of this matter but when you pay attention all your expenditure, it will not a problem for you.
It is
increasingly
common for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to take out debits from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bank
at present time and using a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
card is sort of this act. This essay will highlight
If the text is a generality, ‘of the’ is not necessary.
some of the
benefits and drawbacks that I have resulted from this switch.

Looking
firstly
the advantages,
The character between ‘people’ and ‘s’ is an accent character, not a standard apostrophe character. Use “people’s” (curly apostrophe) or “people’s” (straight apostrophe).
people`s
life is basicer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can possess all properties such a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, a car and something else thanks to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credits
and cards. In the past,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
this system
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
was saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
what they need, and this was
Consider using either the past participle “been” or the present participle “being” here.
be
able to take lots of time due to the cost of item
on the contrary
, nowadays they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
what they desire and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
it
next
years.
For instance
, even if they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
a store, a place or a car for earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in this case
, they can earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
the loans at the same time.

However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who owe the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bank
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
card more than usual can lose everything they possess. I mean, when you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a debit from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bank
, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
a contract and after this process, you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
a certain amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bank
every month. If you have not a condition doing it,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bank
has a right to owe your all properties in exchange for your dept.
As a result
, when you have a purpose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
, you need to
be prepared
to give back the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
of banks.

In conclusion
, we
You used a past participle without using any required verb (‘be’ or ‘have’).
seen
that there are a number of advantages and disadvantages of this matter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
attention all your expenditure, it will not a problem for you.
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IELTS essay People today are able to take out loans from the bank or get a credit card very easily. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this practice?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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