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People spend a lot of money on various things as they earn more money nowadays than before

People spend a lot of money on various things as they earn more money nowadays than before PKbd

In a new millennium, people become more materialistic and enormous money spend by people on shopping due to reputed jobs as compared to past times this notion has both strengths and weaknesses. This essay shall articulate the positive and negative outcomes of this in subsequent paragraphs To embark on, one of the most significant benefits with the connection of more shopping is escalate national income. In simple words, with the growing deman

In a new millennium, This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 become more materialistic and enormous money spend by This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 on shopping due to reputed jobs as compared to past times this notion has both strengths and weaknesses. This essay shall articulate the This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:beneficial
positive
 and This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:adverse
negative
 outcomes of this in subsequent paragraphs To embark on, one of the most significant benefits with the connection of more shopping is Consider using a past participle here: "escalated".escalated
escalate
 national income. In simple words, with the growing Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraphdeman.deman!deman?deman:deman,deman;
deman

IELTS essay People spend a lot of money on various things as they earn more money nowadays than before

Essay

American English

1 paragraphs

71 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
Include an introduction and conclusion
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.5

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.5

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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