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people living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. what are those problems? should the goverment encourage people to move to regional town? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge v.13

people living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. what are those problems? should the goverment encourage people to move to regional town? 13
There is a growing controversy over the overpopulation of metropolitan cities around the world, and some people think that the government should ease the situation of overcrowding as it causes environmental issues and a lack of essential services within the overpopulated cities. I think that the government should take some actions to distribute the population by attracting people to move to regional areas. There are various issues associated with living in a large city. As many people choose to live in somewhere closer to the city centre for school and work, it increases demand for public services such as health, education and public transport. For example, a large city like Tokyo, always has traffic jams during a peak period, people have to drive a car longer than usual. Even using a public transport, it is always packed and people are forced to be on an uncomfortable ride every morning. Furthermore, a large number of traffic on the road causes negative consequences such as a noise problem and air pollution, contributing to environmental issues. In order to ease the situation of overpopulation in a large city, the government should encourage people to move to regional areas, otherwise it harms the environment and further increases the demand for essential public services. The government should provide benefits such as a monetary aid for building houses in a remote town, and an enhancement of public services, especially in the transportation, health and education so that people who reside in a regional town will not feel inconvenient. If necessary infrastructures are available, it makes regional towns more attractive to live in, therefore some people would move out of overcrowded cities. In conclusion, overpopulated cities often face issues such as high demand for the public services and environmental problems owing to a busy traffic. I think that the government should invest money on making regional areas more attractive so that the current situation of overpopulation will be eased.
There is a growing controversy over the overpopulation of metropolitan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
around the world, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
the situation of overcrowding as it causes environmental issues and a lack of essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
within the overpopulated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
actions to distribute the population by attracting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regional
areas.

There are various issues associated with living in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
city. As
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in somewhere closer to the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
for school and work, it increases demand for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
such as health, education and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport.
For example
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
city like Tokyo, always has traffic jams during a peak period,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
drive a car longer than usual. Even using a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport, it is always packed and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are forced
to be on an uncomfortable ride every morning.
Furthermore
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
number of traffic on the road causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences such as a noise problem and air pollution, contributing to environmental issues.

In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
the situation of overpopulation in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
city, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regional
areas,
otherwise
it harms the environment and
further
increases the demand for essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should provide benefits such as a monetary aid for building
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
in a remote town, and an enhancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
,
especially
in the transportation, health and education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who reside in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regional
town will not feel inconvenient. If necessary infrastructures are available, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regional
towns more attractive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in,
therefore
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
out of overcrowded cities.

In conclusion
, overpopulated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
face issues such as high demand for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
and environmental problems owing to
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "busy traffic".
a busy traffic
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should invest money on making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regional
areas more attractive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation of overpopulation will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eased
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay people living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. what are those problems? should the goverment encourage people to move to regional town? 13

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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