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people in my community are generally happy

people in my community are generally happy R08xk
I think people in my community are generally happy. Safe neighbourhood is one of the main reasons that makes people pleased. Security system in my area is always a top priority so level of crime is much lower than that in other places. It's also a suitable place for the elderly to live in because it is quite and peaceful. People feel happy when they have many green spaces. There is a clean park and a large lake nearby. Everyone can go there to relax, play sports, go for a walk, breathe fresh air and notice plants and animal life around. Another important source of our well-being is community connection. The people here are sociable and well-connected. They are willing to support each other in difficult times. For the above reasons, place where I live is really a happy community.
I
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think
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people
in my community are
generally
happy. Safe
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbourhood' is British English.
neighbourhood
is one of the main reasons that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
pleased
. Security system in my area is always a top priority
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
level of crime is much lower than that in other places. It's
also
a suitable place for the elderly to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is quite and peaceful.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
feel happy when they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
green spaces. There is a clean park and a large lake nearby. Everyone can go there to relax, play sports, go for a walk, breathe fresh air and notice plants and animal life around. Another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
source of our well-being is community connection. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
here are sociable and well-connected. They are willing to support each other in difficult times. For the above reasons, place where I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
is
really
a happy community.
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IELTS essay people in my community are generally happy

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
140 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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