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People have different views about whether increasing the driving licenses age or streets' infrastructure is the best way to make roads safety.

People have different views about whether increasing the driving licenses age or streets' infrastructure is the best way to make roads safety. oRbJq
People have different views about whether increasing the driving licenses age or streets' infrastructure is the best way to make roads safe. While strict licenses rule sometimes be useful, I believe that increasing road quality is more important. On the one hand, raising the age at which people can drive can be a great source for drop accidents. When a teenager drives a car while drinking alcohol and has no experience on the road so he may cause an accident. Teenagers are notoriously irresponsible and they can't be handling alcohol while driving. A person who drunk has more chance to cause an accident, but it is more dangerous if he has inexperienced in terms of both alcohol and driving. On the other hand, it is perhaps even more important to improving road safety for all the people who drive. There may be caused due to young drivers but the only factors that cause most of the accidents' sources are how the roads have been planned. For example, if a driver has very enough skill to drive on the road but because of the road, an error he may cause the accident. The urban areas should be constructed on one-way roads and must have a broken tone. It may be inconvenient but it is the best way to reduce accident rates. Building parallel streets can give lower accident results than the ordinary and should have motorcycle roads separately. When cities around the world construct a number of one-way streets it will decline accidents. In conclusion, I can understand why people might want to encourage the minimum legal age for driving cars, but it seems to me that increase road safety is much more important in everyone's life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about whether increasing the driving licenses age or streets' infrastructure is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
safe. While strict licenses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
be useful, I believe that increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
quality is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.

On the one hand, raising the age at which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drive
can be a great source for drop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
. When a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drives
a car while drinking alcohol and has no experience on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Teenagers
are
notoriously
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
irresponsible and
they can't be handling alcohol while driving. A person
A noun should not follow 'who'. Try changing to a verb or maybe to "who is a drunk".
who drunk
has more chance to
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cause
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is more
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dangerous
if he has inexperienced in terms of both alcohol and driving.

On the other hand
, it is perhaps even more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
safety for all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drive
. There may
be caused
due to young drivers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
factors that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
most of the accidents' sources are how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
have
been planned
.
For example
, if a driver has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drive
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
, an error he may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
. The urban areas should
be constructed
on one-way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have a broken tone. It may be inconvenient
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
rates. Building parallel streets can give lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
results than the ordinary and should have motorcycle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
separately
.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
cities around the world construct a number of one-way streets it will decline accidents.

In conclusion
, I can understand why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might want to encourage the minimum legal age for driving cars,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it seems to me that increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
safety is much more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in everyone's life.
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IELTS essay People have different views about whether increasing the driving licenses age or streets' infrastructure is the best way to make roads safety.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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